Ukunqoba Ukucinga Kwakho Okungafanelekanga kunye Nemibono ngokurhoxisa
Izihlungi zengqondo, uhlobo lokuphazamiseka kwengqondo, zithintela kwiipatheni ezingacingiyo ezixhaphakileyo? Ungayitshintsha njani indlela ozijonga ngayo ngeemeko ngokurhoxisa ukuze uhlakulele isimo sengqondo esilungileyo kunye nesimo esihle?
Inkcazo - Izihlungi Zeengqondo
Isihlungi sengqondo lixesha elisetyenziselwa ukuchaza uhlobo oluthile lokuphazamiseka kwengqondo , okanye indlela yokucinga engalunganga, nto leyo inokukhokelela kumazinga aphezulu okuxhalabisa nokuxinezeleka . Xa ucinga nge-filter filter, umntu ugxile kuphela kwimimandla engalunganga yimeko kwaye ucofa zonke ezilungileyo. Abantu abaneli fomu yokucinga kakubi bahlala bebona iglasi yabo njengesiqingatha esingenanto kunokuba isiqingatha sigqibeke kuyo nayiphi na imeko.
Abantu abaxilongwa ngokuba neengxaki zokuphazamiseka ngokuphindaphindiweyo basebenzisa uhlalutyo lwengqondo ukuze bahlule zonke iindawo ezimnandi kunye ezizalisekileyo zobomi babo, ngelixa bebeka ingqalelo kwiingxaki zabo nokunganeliseki. Baya kubeka kwiimvakalelo zabo zokuzimelela kunye nokuziphatha ukuphepha , behluleka ukuphawula indlela abaye bafunda ngayo ukuhlangabezana nokuphazamiseka kwengxaki. Amanqanaba okuxhalabisa aya kuqhubeka ephakama njengoko ubuhle buqhubeka nokuhlanjululwa ngaphandle, ngelixa iingcinga ezichasayo ziqina.
Ngezantsi ziyimimiselo embalwa yokusebenzisa olu hlobo lendlela yokucinga engalunganga. Njengoko ucinga ngale mizekelo, khangela ukuba uyazi indlela yakho yokucinga kwezi meko. Ukuba uzifumanisa kula mabali, funda indlela yokuhlaziya kwakhona izihlungi zakho zengqondo kwiingcamango ezintle kunye nezimvo ezilungileyo.
Imizekelo yezihlungi zengqondo
U-Edmond - Edmond uyingcali kwintsimi yakhe kwaye wacelwa ukuba abonise iseshoni yosuku olulodwa kwikholeji yasekhaya. Ngethuba lokunika ingxelo, uyaqaphela ukuba umfundi uyahamba kwaye akayi kubuya. Emva kweklasi, abafundi abaninzi beza kuye ukuze bambulele ngenxa yenkulumo yakhe ebalulekileyo. Nangona kunjalo, u-Edmond uqhubela ekhaya uvakalelwa ngumsindo ngomfundi oshiye. U-Edmond naye uhlala exhalabile ngokuzibuza kwakhe umsebenzi, ebuza ukuba umfundi uya kuhlala njani ukuba isifundo sakhe sasinomdla ngakumbi.
U-Amy - u-Amy uye wahlala enzima nokukhathazeka okukhulu kunye nokukhathazeka. Ngokusebenzisa i- psychotherapy , uqalise ukufunda ukuxolela abo bamlimazile ngaphambili. Ngokuxolela unina, u-Amy wayenomhlobo obusondeleyo kunye naye waza waqala ukumthemba ngakumbi. Ngenye imini u-Amy wavulela unina malunga nokuxilongwa kwakhe. Ukumangaliswa kuka-Amy, unina akazange aphendule kangangoko u-Amy ayekulindele. U-Amy wathukuthela waza wazimisela ukuba akaze amele amxolele kwindawo yokuqala. Unina waxolisa ngenxa yokungaqondi, kodwa u-Amy wenqaba ukuthetha naye. U-Amy ngoku uvakalelwa kukuba unyango luyinkcitho ngexesha lakhe.
Ukusebenzisa ukurhoxisa ukunqoba iiFilisi zengqondo kunye nokuCinga okungenanto
U-Edmond - u- Edmond ucaphukile ngomfundi owashiya ukuba akanako ukuvuma kwaye amkele iincoma azifumene. Unokwenza kwakhona imeko yakhe ngokugxininisa ngakumbi kwiimpendulo ezilungileyo ezivela kwabanye abafundi. Esikhundleni sokucoca kwiingcamango zokuzibulala, u-Edmond unokukhetha ukugxila kwizinto ezilungileyo kwimeko. Unako ukuqonda ukuba kunokwenzeka ukuba akuyena wonke umntu onandipha inkulumo yakhe, kodwa abafundi abaninzi bazuza kuyo. Mhlawumbi unokukwazi ukuqonda ukuba nayiphi na imeko yenkcazo kubakho abantu abathile abangabongiyo, kwaye bazinikezele ngentsapho emva kokuba, ngokulandeleleneyo, wayenempendulo ebalulekileyo kwiintetho zakhe.
U-Amy- Amy uhluleka ukubona izinto ezintle zobudlelwane bakhe nonina-ngokugxila kwizinto ezimbi. U-Amy wasebenza isibindi namandla okuxolela unina waza wakhula ubuhlobo naye. Nangona kunjalo, ucaphukile ukuba unina akazange amphendule ngendlela awafuna ngayo. Ukuba u-Amy uyayifumanisa le nto yokucoca, unokukwazi ukubona izinto ngendlela efanelekileyo. U-Amy unako ukuqonda ukuba unina akanakho ukwenza ngendlela afuna ngayo, kodwa oko akuthethi ukuba ukuzuza kuka-Amy ngonyango kwakungekho nto.
Ngaphantsi kwee-Filters zengqondo kunye ne-Reframing
Ukubona ukuphazamiseka kwimeko kungabonakalisa ukuphazamiseka kwengqondo kubantu abaxhalabisayo . Sinokuzikhethela ukuba siqaphele kuphela into engafanelekanga okanye sibone isiliva sesilivere kwimeko ethile. Ukuze unqobe le fomu yokucinga okungeyiyo, yenza umzame ukufanisa yonke ingcamango engalunganga malunga neemeko ezintle. Emva kokuba usugqibile ukwenza oku, unokuba ufuna ukuzama ukufumana iinqununu zesilivere kwiimeko apho kukho izinto ezingenakulungelelanisa!
Indlela yokuvuselela iingcamango ezingekho phantsi
Xa sinike le mizekelo yokusebenzisa ukuhlaziya ukujongana nezihlungi zengqondo, kubalulekile ukuchaza ngokukhawuleza oko sithethayo ngokurhoxisa. Ukurhoxisa yindlela yokuguqula indlela yakho yokufumana into ethile. Imeko ayitshintshi, kodwa indlela oya kubona ngayo imeko iguquka.
Uninzi lweemeko ebomini bethu lunokujongwa ngendlela engaphezulu kweyodwa. Umzekelo unokuba ngumfazi omncinci ohamba ngekhemotherapy kumhlaza webele, unyango obangela ukulahlekelwa kwazo zonke iinwele emzimbeni. Unokukhangela le meko ngenye indlela kwaye uxinezeleke ngokupheleleyo ngokulahlekelwa yintswele zakho ezintle. Okomnye, unokuwujonga ngenye indlela. Awunakuze uhlambe imilenze yakho ezintandathu ezintandathu! Lo mzekelo uphezulu kakhulu kuninzi (ewe, uyasichukumisa) kodwa ukhonza njengesikhumbuzo sokuba ngamanye amaxesha ukuhlaziya kufuneka "uyenze uze uwenze." Ungadinga ukugxininisa kanzima kwi-reframed yakho ucinga ngayo ukuba uphumelele ingcamango yakho engafanelekiyo, kodwa iingcaphephe zisitsho oku kusebenzayo.
Emva kokugqitywa kweli nqaku kunye nokuqwalasela indlela u-Edmond no-Amy basebenzisa ngayo ukulungisa ukujongana nalolu hlobo lokuphazamiseka kwengqondo, unokufuna ukuphonononga ezinye iindlela ongayisebenzisa ngayo ukuhlaziya ukunciphisa uxinzelelo kuquka ukukhangela oko unokutshintsha, kunye nokufumana amahlaya.
Kunokwenzeka ukuba utshintshe ukujonga kwakho imeko, kwaye usebenzise ukurhoxisa ukunqoba indlela yokucinga engalunganga eyenziwa ngabahluzi bezengqondo.
Imithombo:
Caouette, J., no-A. Guyer. Ukuphazamiseka kwengcamango Ukuxinezeleka okuphakathi kunye neempembelelo ezichaphazelekayo kwi-Accepts and Rejecting. Umbhalo weengxaki ezichaphazelekayo . 2016. 190: 792-9.
Rnic, K., Dozois, D., noRar Martin. Ukuphazamiseka kwengqondo, iindlela zoButyebi kunye nokuPhepha. I-European Journal ye-Psychology . 2016. 12 (3): 348-362.