Izindlela zoKhuselo azizizi kakuhle iimpendulo zengqondo ezikhusela abantu kwizinto ezisongelayo nezinto abangafuni ukucinga ngazo okanye ukuhlangabezana nazo. Leli qela laqala ukunyango lwe-psychoanalytic, kodwa liye lisebenza ngokuthe ngcembe kwindlela yokuthetha kwimihla ngemihla. Cinga ngethuba lokugqibela ekubhekiselele kumntu ngokuthi "uyayiphika" okanye umtyhola umntu "wokulinganisa." Zombini le mizekelo ibhekisela kwindlela yokukhusela.
Ngoko Yintoni eyiyo yoKhuselo?
Okugqithiseleyo kusetshenziswe nguSigmund Freud kwiingcamango zakhe ze-psychoanalytic, indlela yokukhusela yindlela ekhuselweyo eyenziwa yi-ego ukukhusela ukuxhalabisa. Iinkqubo zoKhuselo zicingelwa ukuba zigcine ingqondo kwiimvakalelo kunye neengcamango ezinzima kakhulu ukuba ingqondo ikwazi ukuhlangabezana nayo. Kwamanye amaxesha, iindlela zokukhusela zicingelwa ukuba zigcine iingcamango ezingalunganga okanye ezingafunekiyo kunye nempembelelo yokungena engqondweni.
Kwimodeli ka-Sigmund Freud yobuntu, i- ego yinkalo yobuntu ejongene nenyaniso. Ngethuba ukwenza oku, i-ego kwakhona kufuneka ihlangabezane neemfuno ezingqubuzanayo ze- ID kunye ne- superego.
I-ID iyinxalenye yobuntu obufuna ukuzalisekisa zonke iimfuno, iimfuno kunye neziphumo. Yona inxalenye ebalulekileyo, eyintloko yobuntu bethu kwaye ayiqwalasele izinto ezifana nokufaneleka kwezentlalo, ukuziphatha, okanye nokuba yinyani yokufezekisa iimfuno zethu neemfuno zethu. I-superego izama ukwenza i-ego ukuba isebenze ngendlela efanelekileyo yokuziphatha. Le nxalenye yobuntu iyenziwe yonke imilinganiselo yokuziphatha ngaphakathi kunye namaxabiso esiwafumana kubazali bethu, amanye amalungu entsapho, iimpembelelo zonqulo kunye noluntu.
Ukuze ukwazi ukujamelana nokuxhalaba, uFrud wayekholelwa ukuba iindlela zokukhusela zanceda ukhusela i-ego ukusuka kwimpikiswano eyenziwe yi- id, superego, kunye nenyaniso .
Ngoko kwenzeka ntoni xa i-ego ikwazi ukujongana neemfuno zeminqweno yethu, imithintelo yokwenyani, kunye nemilinganiselo yethu yokuziphatha? NgokukaFreud , ukuxhalaba kuyinto engathandekiyo phakathi kwabantu abafuna ukuyiphepha. Ukuxhalabisa kusebenza njengesigxina kwi-ego yokuba izinto azihambi ngendlela abafanele ngayo. Ngenxa yoko, i-ego isebenzisa uhlobo oluthile lokuzikhusela ukuze luncede ukunciphisa le mizwa yokuxhalaba.
Iintlobo zokuxhalabisa
Akuzona zonke iintlobo zokuxhalabisa ezenziwe zilinganayo. Akunjalo na ezi zixhala zivela kwimithombo efanayo. UFrud ufumene iintlobo ezintathu zokuxhalabisa:
- Ukuxhalabisa nge-Neurotic kukungakhathazeki ukuba siya kulahlekelwa izibongozo ze-id, okubangelwa ukujeziswa ngokuziphatha okungalunganga.
- Ukuxhalabisa ngokwenene kukuba ukwesaba iimeko zehlabathi. Isizathu salolu xhalaba siqheleke ngokulula. Ngokomzekelo, umntu unokwesaba ukufumana inja ukuluma xa besondelene nenja esondayo. Indlela eqhelekileyo yokunciphisa eli xhaphalo kukuphepha into esongelayo.
- Ukuxhalabisa ngokuziphatha kukubandakanya ukwesaba ukuphula imithetho yethu yokuziphatha.
Nangona sinokusebenzisa ngokuchanekileyo ezi ndlela, kwiimeko ezininzi ezi zikhuseli zisebenza ngokungazi ukuba ziphosakele. Umzekelo, ukuba ubhekene nomsebenzi ongathandekiyo, ingqondo yakho inokukhetha ukulibala uxanduva lwakho ukuze ugweme isabelo esinoyiko. Ukongezelela ukulibala, ezinye iindlela zokuzibandakanya ziquka ukulinganisa, ukuphika, ukunyanzeliswa, ukuchaswa, ukuchaswa kunye nokwenziwa komsebenzi.
Nangona zonke iinkqubo zokukhusela zingaba zibi, ziyakwazi ukulungelelanisa kwaye zivumele ukuba sisebenze ngokuqhelekileyo. Iingxaki ezinkulu ziphakama xa iindlela zokukhusela zisetyenziselwa ukukhusela iingxaki. Kwicandelo le- psychoanalytic , injongo inokuba kukunceda umthengi ukufumanisa iindlela ezikhuselekanga zokuzikhusela kwaye athole iindlela ezingcono zokuhlangabezana nokuxhalabisa nokuxinzezeleka.
Intombi kaSigmund Freud, u- Anna Freud uchaza iindlela ezili-10 zokuzikhusela ezihlukeneyo ezisetyenziswa yi-ego. Abanye abaphandi baye bachaza iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokukhusela ezongezelelweyo.
1 - Ukufuduka
Ngaba unomsebenzi obi kakhulu emsebenzini kwaye wabuya ekhaya waza wathintela uxinzelelo lwakho kwiintsapho kunye nabahlobo? Emva koko uye wafumana indlela yokuzivikela ye-ego yokufuduka.
Ukufuduka kubandakanya ukukhupha iingcamango zethu, iimvakalelo kunye neziphumo zabantu okanye izinto ezingasongela. Ulwaphulo oludlulileyo ngumzekelo oqhelekileyo wendlela yokukhusela. Esikhundleni sokubonakalisa umsindo wethu ngeendlela ezingakhokelela kwimiphumo emibi (njengokuphikisana nomphathi wethu), thina kunoko sivakalisa umsindo wethu kumntu okanye into engeyiyo ingozi (njengomlingane wethu, abantwana okanye izilwanyana).
2 - Ukulahla
Ukulahlwa mhlawumbi yindlela yeendlela zokuzivikela eziqhelekileyo, ezisetyenziswe ngokuphindaphindiweyo ukuchaza imeko apho abantu babonakala bengenakukwazi ukuhlangabezana nokunyaniseka okanye ukuvuma inyaniso ecacileyo (oko kukuthi "Uphikile."). Ukukhanyela kukugatya ngokukodwa ukuvuma okanye ukuqonda ukuba kukho into eyenziwe okanye okwenzekayo ngoku. Izidakamizwa okanye izidakila zivame ukuphika ukuba zinengxaki, ngelixa ixhoba leemeko eziphazamisayo zingakhanyela ukuba eso siganeko senzeke.
Imisebenzi yokulahla ukukhusela i-ego kwizinto apho umntu angakwazi ukuhlangabezana nayo. Nangona oku kungasisindisa kwixinzelelo okanye intlungu, ukukhanyela kufuna kwakhona utyalo-mali obuninzi. Ngenxa yoko, ezinye iisetyenziso zisetyenziselwa ukugcina le mizwa engavumelekanga ekuqapheliseni ulwazi.
Kwiimeko ezininzi, kunokubakho ubungqina obuninzi bokuthi into enyanisekileyo, kodwa umntu uya kuqhubeka ekhanyela ukukho okanye inyaniso kuba ayinakulungele ukujamelana.
Ukukhishwa kungabandakanya ukukhanyela ukukhokelwa kwinto okanye inyaniso. Kwezinye iimeko, kunokubandakanya ukuvuma ukuba into yinyani, kodwa ukunciphisa ukubaluleka kwayo. Ngamanye amaxesha abantu baya kwamkela inyani kunye nokunyaniseka kwento, kodwa baya kukhanyela uxanduva lwabo kwaye esikhundleni sokuba bathethe abanye abantu okanye ezinye izinto ezingaphandle.
Umlutha ungomnye wemimiselo eyaziwa kakhulu yokukhanyela. Abantu ababhekene neengxaki zokusetyenziswa kakubi kweziyobisi baya kukhanyela ukuba ukuziphatha kwabo kunzima. Kwezinye iimeko, banokuvuma ukuba basebenzise iziyobisi okanye utywala, kodwa baya kubanga ukuba ukusetyenziswa kakubi kweziyobisi akuyona ingxaki.
3 - Uxinzelelo kunye nokuCima
Ingcinezelo yindlela enye eyaziwayo yokukhusela. Uxinzelelo lugcina ukugcina ulwazi ngaphandle kokuqonda. Nangona kunjalo, le nkumbulo ayikuphela nje; baqhubeka befuthe ukuziphatha kwethu. Umzekelo, umntu oye wagxotha iinkumbulo zokuxhaphazwa xa umntwana esenokuba nzima ukudala ubudlelwane.
Ngamanye amaxesha senza oku qondayo ngokunyanzelisa ulwazi olungathandekiyo ngaphandle kolwazi lwethu, olubizwa ngokuba yinkcitho. Kwiimeko ezininzi, nangona kunjalo, ukukhutshwa kwezikhumbuzo ezibangelwa ukukhathazeka ngenxa yokuqonda kwethu kukholelwa ukuba kwenzeka ngokungazi.
4 - Intlawulelo
I-Sublimation yindlela yokukhusela evumela ukuba senze iimpembelelo ezingavumelekanga ngokuguqula ezi ziphatha ngendlela efanelekileyo. Umzekelo, umntu onomsindo ogqithiseleyo unokuthatha ukuthatha ibhola yokukhaba njengendlela yokuxhalabisa. UFrud wayekholelwa ukuba i-sublimation ibonisa ukukhula okuvumela abantu ukuba basebenze ngokuqhelekileyo kwindlela ezamkelekileyo kuluntu.
5 - Inkqubo
Iprojection yindlela yokukhusela equka ukuthatha iimpawu zethu okanye iimvakalelo ezingavumelekanga nokuzichazela kwabanye abantu. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba unomdla onamandla kumntu, mhlawumbi ukholelwa ukuba akayithandi. Iprojection isebenza ngokuvumela ukubonakalisa umnqweno okanye umtsalane, kodwa ngendlela engakwazi ukuyiqonda ngayo, ngoko ukunciphisa uxhalaba.
6 - Intellectualalization
Intellectualalization isebenza ukunciphisa uxhalabo ngokucinga ngeziganeko ezibandayo, kwikliniki. Le ndlela yokukhusela isenza sikwazi ukuphepha ukucinga malunga nokuxinezeleka, kwimiba yemoya kwaye kunoko kugxininise kuphela kwinqanaba leengqondo. Ngokomzekelo, umntu ofumaniswe ukuba unesigulo esipheleleyo unokugxila ekufundeni yonke into ngesifo ukuze ukhuphe ukuxinzezeleka kwaye ahlale kude kwiimeko.
7 - Ukulinganisa
Ukulungiswa kwemilinganiselo yindlela yokukhusela ebandakanya ukuchaza indlela yokuziphatha engavumelekanga okanye ukuvakalelwa ngendlela engqiqweni okanye efanelekileyo, ukuphepha izizathu ezifanelekileyo zokuziphatha. Ngokomzekelo, umntu ojikelelwe umhla unokuthi aqikelele imeko ngokuthi ayakhange athwele omnye umntu. Umfundi unokugxeka umvuzo wokuvavanya umqeqeshi kunokuba akwazi ukulungiselela.
Ukulungiswa kwemilinganiselo kungekhona kuphela okuthintela uxhalaba, kunokukhusela ukuzithemba nokuzimela . Xa bejongene nempumelelo okanye ukungaphumeleli, abantu bathambekele ekubhekiselele kwimpumelelo yabo kwiimpawu kunye nezakhono xa ukuphulwa kuthathwa kwabanye abantu okanye ngaphandle kwemikhosi.
8 - Ukunyanzeliswa
Xa sibhekene neziganeko ezixinzelelekileyo, ngamanye amaxesha abantu bayeke ukucwangcisa izixhobo baze baphinde baphenduke kwiipatheni zokuziphatha ezisetyenziswe ngaphambili kwiphuhliso. U-Anna Freud wabiza le ndlela yokukhusela, ukubonisa ukuba abantu baphatha iimpawu ezivela kwinqanaba lokuphuhliswa kwengqondo ngokocwangciso. Ngokomzekelo, umntu olungiswe kwisigaba sokuphuhlisa esingaphambili angakhalela okanye akhuphe xa eva iindaba ezimbi.
Iintlobo zentlupheko ehambelana nokulawulwa komzimba ziyahluka kakhulu kuxhomekeke kwiliphi nqanaba apho umntu elungiselelwe khona. Umntu olungiselelwe kwisigaba somlomo angase aqale ukutya okanye ukutshaya ngokugqithiseleyo, okanye abe ngumlomo onobudlova. Ukulungiswa kwisigaba esilungileyo kunokubangela ukulungelelanisa okanye ukuphazamiseka.
9 - Ukuzibandakanya
Ukubunjwa kwezenzo kunciphisa uxhalaba ngokuthatha imvakalelo ephikisanayo, impembelelo, okanye ukuziphatha. Umzekelo wokubunjwa kwamabele wawuza kunyanga umntu ongeyithandi kakhulu ngendlela enobungcali ukuze ufihle iimvakalelo zakho zokwenene. Kutheni abantu beziphatha ngale ndlela? Ngokutsho kukaFreud, basebenzisa ukubunjwa kwezenzo njengendlela yokukhusela ukufihla iimvakalelo zabo zangempela ngokuziphatha ngendlela echasene ngqo.
10 - Ezinye iindlela zoKhuselo
Ekubeni uFrud kuqala uchaza iindlela zokuqala zokukhusela, abanye abaphandi baye baqhubeka bechaza ezinye iindlela zokunciphisa uxhalaba. Ezinye zeendlela zokukhusela ziquka:
Ukwenza oku: Kule ndlela yokukhusela, umntu uhlangabezana noxinzelelo ngokubandakanyeka kwizenzo kunokubonakalisa iimvakalelo zangaphakathi.
Ukubambisana: Oku kubandakanya ukuphendukela kwabanye abantu ukuxhasa.
Injongo yokusivimbela: Kulolu hlobo lokukhusela, umntu uyamkela ifomu eguqulwayo yinjongo yawo yokuqala (oko kukuthi ube ngumqeqeshi wekhakhamari ephakamileyo esikolweni kunokuba ngumdlali wezemidlalo.)
Altruism: Iimfuno zangaphakathi eziwanelisayo ngokunceda abanye.
Ukuphepha: Ukungafuni ukujongana okanye ukuhlangabezana nezinto ezingamnandi okanye imeko.
Ukuhlawulelwa: Ukugqithisa ngaphezulu kommandla omnye ukuhlawulela ukungaphumeleli kwelinye.
Ukuzihlaziya: Ukubonisa izinto ezihlekisayo okanye eziyingozi kwiimeko.
Ubunzima-ubundlobongela: Ngokungaqondile ukubonisa umsindo.
Ubungqina: Ukuphepha ukunyaniseka ngokubuyela kwindawo ephephile engqondweni yakho.
Ukuhlehlisa: Oku kubandakanya ukuzama ukwenza oko uvakalelwa kukuba ingcinga engafanelekanga, iimvakalelo, okanye iimpawu zokuziphatha. Ukuba uphazamise iimvakalelo zomntu, unokucela ukuba wenze into enhle kubo ukuze ukhuphe ukuxhalaba kwakho.
Nangona iindlela zokukhusela zivame ukucingwa njengeempembelelo ezimbi, sonke siyazifuna ukuba zinciphise uxinzelelo kwaye zikhusele ukuzithemba ngexesha lexesha elibucayi, ukuvumela i-US ukuba igxile kwizinto eziyimfuneko okwangoku. Ezinye zezi zikhuselo zinokuba luncedo kunezinye. Ngokomzekelo, ukusebenzisa amahlaya ekunqobeni uxinzelelo, imeko exhalabisayo ngokwenene ingaba yindlela yokuzikhusela.
ILizwi
Ezinye zeendlela ezikhuselekileyo zokuzivikela ziye zaba yinto eqhelekileyo yolwimi lwansuku zonke. Singachaza umntu ukuba 'uyayiphika' yengxaki abajongene nayo. Xa umntu ebuyela kwiindlela zakudala zokwenza izinto, sinokuthiwa "ukulungiswa" kwinqanaba eliphambili lokuphuhliswa.
Kubalulekile ukuba ukhumbule ukuba iindlela zokukhusela zingaba zilungile kwaye zimbi. Baya kunceda indima ekhuselekileyo ngokukhusela i-ego yakho kwixinzelelo kunye nokubonelela ngempilo. Kwamanye amaxesha, ezi ndlela zokukhusela zinokukubuyisela ekujonganeni neemeko kwaye zingenza njengendlela yokuzikhohlisa.
Ukuba uqaphele ukuba ukusetyenziswa kakubi kweendlela ezithile zokukhusela kubangele impembelelo ebomini bakho, qwa lasele ugqirha, isazi sengqondo sengqondo okanye enye ingcali yezempilo yengqondo ukuze ufumane iingcebiso kunye noluncedo olungakumbi. Cinga ngokuthatha iindlela zokuzikhusela iimviwo ukuze ubone indlela okwazi ngayo ukujonga iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zokukhusela kwisenzo.
> Imithombo:
> Burgo, J. Kutheni Ndiyenza loo nto? Iindlela zoKhuselo zengqondo kunye neNdlela ezifihliweyo Benza Ubomi Bethu. I-Chapel Hill, NC: I-Press Rise Press; 2012.
> Corey, G. Inkolelo kunye nokuSebenza kweNgcebiso kunye neengqondo zengqondo (8th.). EBelmont, CA: Thomson Brooks / Cole; 2009.