Izibonakaliso zomngcipheko wobuntu bomda (BPD) kumsebenzi ziyahlukahluka, kubandakanywa iindlela ezahlukileyo ezi zichaphazela ukusebenza kwakho komsebenzi kunye nokukwazi "ukungena" kunye nabo osebenza nabo.
Ukuba unayo i-BPD, usenokuba namava omsebenzi okwenzakalisayo, abantu abasebenza nawe, okanye zombini. Ukuba kunjalo, uyazi ukuba kutheni kwenzeka ezo ziganeko eziphazamisayo-indlela zakho iimpawu zeBPD eziye zadlala indima?
Singakwazi ukuthetha ngokude malunga neendlela ezahlukeneyo zeempawu ezithile ze-BPD ezinokuchaphazela ukusebenza komsebenzi wakho, kodwa umzekelo ungabonisa oku ngakumbi ngempumelelo. Mhlawumbi lo mzekelo womntu onomntu omnye nge-BPD emsebenzini unokukunceda uqonde umsebenzi wakho wokudimazeka ngakumbi-kwaye unokukunceda ukuba ungawaphinda.
Njengoko ufunda kulo mzekelo, siza kufaka amanqaku emityaleni ukuze usiye kwaye ucinge ukuba uye wafumana into efanayo. Musa ukuxhalaba ukuba akukho nanye oku kuhambelana namava akho, nangona kunjalo, kukho ininzi yokufunda kulo mzekelo kunoma ubani-ngaphandle okanye ngaphandle kwe-BPD.
Indlela i-BPD inokuchaphazela ngayo uYobhi Wakho: Imbali Yomsebenzi ojikelezayo
Kwimeko yethu yokufunda, indoda egama linguBruce ohlala neBPD inomlando wokuguquka komsebenzi. Ngokugqithiseleyo, uyonwabile okokuqala, ngoko ke uncinci, kwaye unesiqhamo, wabuyela emsebenzini olandelayo. Ngalinye ixesha le nzekayo, ulahlekelwe ukuqonda ukuba kutheni.
Nantsi ingqalelo indlela oku kwenzeka ngayo. Njengoko ufunda ibali lakhe, cinga ngendlela oye wajamelana ngayo namava afana nawo emsebenzini nasemdlalweni. Ukucinga ngamava akho kunye naluphi na ukufana kunokukunceda ukuba bobabini nibone into ebangela ukukhathazeka, kunye nokuqala ukujonga ngendlela onokuyenza ngayo.
Usenokufuna ukubamba isiqwenga sephepha kunye neepeni uze ubhale phantsi nantoni na evakalelwa njengamava akho. Ngaloo maphupha uyaphawula ukuba unomfanekiso wedwa, okanye usebenze nomgqirha wakho, ngendlela yokwenza utshintsho oluyimfuneko ukuze wenze isiphelo sakho siphelo esivuyisayo.
Umsebenzi omtsha-Ukususela kwiNwabilo Eqalayo Ukuphela Kwomsindo
UBruce uhlala evuya kakhulu xa eqala umsebenzi omtsha. Utshela wonke umntu ukuba ubona njani ukuzaliseka komsebenzi, kwaye kwiiveki ezimbalwa zokuqala, akakwazi ukuthetha ngokwaneleyo malunga nokuthanda kwakhe umphathi kunye nabasebenza naye. Uthetha nenkampani kwaye wabelane ngamaphupha akhe ngokufudukela kwimisebenzi enoxanduva.
(Thatha umzuzu wokukhawuleza ukuba ucinga ukuba uke waziva njani ngale ndlela xa uqala umsebenzi omtsha, okanye ulwalamano olutsha. Ngaba ucinga abanye abantu ekuqaleni?)
Nangona kunjalo, emva nje kwexesha elifutshane, uBruce uqala ukuziva ukuba umphathi wakhe "uphumelele." Uyabona zonke izicelo zomsebenzi okanye isikhokelo njengokugxeka okungafanelekanga. Kananjalo uyaxhalabisa ngokusebenzisana nabasebenzi asebenza nabo. Ukhononda malunga noko akubonayo njengemigudu yabo yokungabikho komsebenzi okungekho mntu ubonakalayo okanye uyamkhathalela.
(Phinda uthathe umzuzu ukuba ucinge ukuba le nto yenzekile kuwe. Ngaba uqalise ngokulindela okuphezulu ukuba ungaxhatshazwa kunye nalabo oye wawachukumisa okokuqala?)
Ngeli xesha, kuyacaca kuBruce ukuba abaphathi bakhe kunye nabasebenza naye abamthandi kwaye bamkhetha.
Ekugqibeleni, uBruce ukholelwa ukuba abantu baseofisi bazama ukufumana izizathu zokumtshisa, kwaye uyasabela ngomsindo. Uyakhala kwaye afunge kumphathi wakhe ngelixa ekhononda malunga nokuba yintoni imeko engalunganga kwaye "isoloko ikhona." Ukuthukuthela kwakhe kunye nokungahloniphi kumphathi wakhe kunokuphela kuphela enye indlela: UBruce uvumelekile ukuba afune omnye umsebenzi omtsha.
(Kanti, kwakhona, ngaba ufumene into efana nale? Ngaba uhamba ngokukhawuleza unomsindo kunye nomphathi okanye usebenza naye de uvele uphuze umsindo?)
Iimpawu zeBPD kwindawo yoMsebenzi
Kulo mzekelo, uBruce ubonisa iimpawu ezilandelayo ze-BPD emsebenzini:
- Ubudlelwane obunzulu / obuzinzileyo
Imvakalelo yokuqala kaBruce ebantwini abasebenza naye kunye no-boss banamandla kwaye banengqondo. Ubabona bengenzi nto iphosakeleyo kwaye njengabalingani abanamandla abathanda nokumxhasa. Nangona kunjalo, le miva idala ingqalelo kwizinto ezimbi, ezigxekayo. Ngoku uBruce akabonanga nto efanelekileyo ngabantu abasebenzisana naye, endaweni yoko ubabhekana nabo njengabamelene nabasemva. Isigaba sokugqibelela ekugqibeleni sikhokelela ekuhlaziyweni . Olu xabiso lwenzeka ngokukhawuleza ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, okanye ngokuphindaphindiweyo, ngokukhawuleza ngokuphendula ngenxa yengqiqo yokugatywa (ukunyaniseka kokushiya.) - Ukutshiza
Xa umbono kaBruce uguquka ukusuka ekubukeleni kuya kuhlaziywa, ukutshintsha kwimiba emihle kuya kwiingcamango ezimbi. Egqithiswe ngumsindo wakhe, akakwazi ukukhumbula ukuba waziva ehlukileyo. Ukuchithwa yindlela yokukhusela eqhelekileyo kubantu abane-BPD. Esikhundleni sokubona omnye umntu njengento enobungakanani kunye nezici ezimbalwa ezimbi, ukutshintshela "kumntu ombi" kugqibelele kumzamo wokuphepha ukukhutshwa. Ekubeni uninzi (mhlawumbi lonke) luneziphumo ezimbi ezixutywe kunye nokulungileyo, olu tshintsho luvame ukuvela ngexesha kungakhathaliseki ukuba ngubani umphathi, osebenza nabo, okanye umhlobo, okwenzekayo. Ukuba uyazibuza ukuba ngaba uhlala ukwahlukana, cinga ngamagama ngokubhekiselele kulwalamano oludla ngokubhekiselele ukuba ukwahlukana kuye kwenzeke: soloko, kungapheli, kugqibelele, kungenakwenzeka, kubonakaliswe, kuyingozi, kwaye kuyingozi. - Ukuhlonipha ukuVunywa
Ubumnandi obuninzi kakhulu bukaBruce kwizinto azifumanayo njengoko ukugatya kubangela iingcamango ukuba umphathi wakhe kunye nabo asebenza nabo abamthandi kwaye bazama ukumkhwelisa. Isimo sakhe sengqondo ngomsebenzi wakhe kunye noogxa bakhe baqhubela phambili, njengoko ngaphambili, uvumelekile ukuba ahambe.
Ngaba uBruce wayelungile ngendlela ayeziva ngayo? Oko umphathi wakhe kunye nabo basebenza nabo bacinga ngoye njengoko ekhula ngokukrakra nangomsindo. Kungenjalo, nokuba kunjalo, ukuba izenzo zabo kuBruce zazingenakwenzeka kwindlela engafanelekanga ngayo.
Ukuphila Ngomngcipheko Wobuntu Borderline (BPD)
Ukuba uzibonile kule mzekelo, unokuzibuza ukuba izinto zingafani njani. Enyanisweni, kukho into enokuyenza enokukunceda ukujamelana neempawu zeBPD. Ingxenye yenkqubo inokuqala ukuqaphela iipatheni ekuziphatheni kwakho. Ukuqaphela le patheni akusayi kuguqula oko uvakalelwa ngaphakathi. Usenokufuna ubaleke kwaye uxelele umphathi "unobungozi" ukuba isenzo esisebenzayo senza ukuba uloyiko lokushiya. Nangona kunjalo ungazifunda iindlela ezintsha zokusabela oko kunokubangela ukuphela kweziphumo.
Isinyathelo sokuqala kukufumana ugqirha oziva ukhululekile. Nje ngokuba kunye nolwalamano, ukufumana umgqirha kunokuba ngumngeni. Abantu abaninzi abane-BPD badlulela kuhlobo olufanayo lomjikelo ukhankanywe ngasentla kunye nomgqirha, okokuqala ulungelelanisa ugqirha ke ngoko, ukuba kukho into ebangela ukulahlekelwa kwawo, qalisa ukungawuthandi kakhulu ugqirha. Kubalulekile ukuqwalasela oku xa uqala ukufumana iimvakalelo ezimbi ngexesha lonyango lwakho. Oku kubaluleke kakhulu. Kuye kwafunyanwa ukwelashwa kwexesha elifutshane kunye nexesha elide ukuphucula amandla omsebenzi kubantu abahlala ne-BPD. Nazi ezinye izinto oza kuzijonga kwi-BPD enkulu .
Unokufuna nokuqala ukufunda malunga nendlela yokukhusela i-BPD , kunye nendlela yokulawula iibangela xa zivela.
Ukongezelela ekusebenzeni kwonyango, ukunyamekela i-BPD kubaluleke kakhulu ekujonganeni nengxaki. Khangela ezi zakhono zokubhekana ne- BPD ezingakunceda ukuba usebenza okanye ulwalamano lwakho.
Imithombo:
Elliott, B., kunye no R. Konet. Indawo yoxhumo: Inkqubo yokulungiswa kweso sikhundla sabanye abantu abane-Borderline Personality Disorder. Uluntu kunye neNgxelo yezeMpilo yengqondo . 2014. 50 (1): 41-5.
Knekt, P., Lindfors, O., Keinanen, M., Heinonen, E., Virtala, E., noT. Harkanen. Ukubikezelwa kweNqanaba loMntu woMgangatho ekunciphisweni kweMpawu zengqondo kunye nokuPhuculwa koMsebenzi oMfutshane kwiNgxaki zengqondo zesikhatshane kwixesha elide. Psychology and Psychotherapy . 2016 Ngomhla wama-30 (uEpub ngaphambi kokuprinta).
Sansone, R., noMnu Wiederman. Ukulahlekelwa nguYobhi ngenjongo: Ubudlelwane noBuntu obuMdatha oMoya weSymptomatology. Ukungenelela kwangaphambili kwi-Psychiatry . 2013. 7 (2): 210-2.