Abantu abaneBPD bahlala bekulwela ukuthetha ngokufanelekileyo
Xa ukuphazamiseka komntu ongekho emngceleni (BPD) kwenza ukuba kunzima ukuthetha nomntu obathandayo, ukulandela inkxaso, ukubonisa uvelwano kunye nenyaniso (SET) inokukunceda. Ingaba yindlela enokuthetha ngayo nomhlobo okanye ilungu losapho olwa ne-BPD kwaye enze ukuba azive evezwe kwaye aqondwe.
Kutheni SETYENZA IMISEBENZI NOMSEBENZI WEZINDAWO ZOMNTU
Iimpawu zeengxaki zomntu ongenamkhawulo (BPD) zingabangela umntu onomntu ongenayo i-BPD ukucela izinto eziphikisanayo okanye akakwazi ukuqonda ukuba omnye umntu uyabakhathalela, ngakumbi ngexesha loxinzelelo .
Angenako ukufumana iimvakalelo eziphikisanayo ngexesha elifanayo kwaye unokubona izinto zibe zimnyama kunye ezimhlophe kunye ne-shades encane kakhulu.
Indlela ye-SET ikuvumela ukuba uthethe ngokunyanisekileyo iimfuno zakho zomthandayo, iimfundiso okanye iimvakalelo, ngelixa uqhubeka unemida efanelekileyo. Ngenxa yokuba isinyathelo ngasinye sakha ekugqibeleni, kubalulekile ukwenza ezi nyathelo ngokulandelelana.
Inkxaso
Inkxaso ibhekisele kwisitatimende sokuqala esibonisa ukuba uyamxhasa umntu ophethe i-BPD. Ingxelo eqala ngo "I" kwaye ibonisa inkxalabo kunye nomnqweno wokunceda. Kungaba nayiphi na into eyenza isiseko sobudlelwane okanye ukusebenzisana: "Ndifuna ukuzama ukukunceda uzive ungcono," "Ndiyakhathalela" okanye "Ndixhalabile ngendlela ovakalelwa ngayo."
Ingxelo yokuxhasa injongo yokuqinisekisa omnye umntu ukuba ubuhlobo lukhuselekile kwaye iimfuno zakhe zixabisa ngethuba lexeshana.
Uvelwano
Uvelwano lubhekisela ekunxibelelaniseni ukuba uyayiqonda loo nto umntu ovakalelwa ngayo kwaye ugxininise "kuwe." Akunjalo ukuthunyelwa kwesisa okanye uvelwano, kodwa kunoko ukuqonda okwenyaniso kunye nokuqinisekiswa kwemvakalelo yomnye umntu, njengokuthi, "Ndiyabona uvutha ngumsindo, kwaye ndiqonda indlela onokugwenxa ngayo," okanye "njani ukukhathazeka oku kufuneka kube kuwe. "
Kubalulekile ukuba ungaxeleli i-BP ukuba uvakalelwa njani, kodwa kunoko, mbeke ukuba abe nemvakalelo ngamazwi. Injongo kukubonisa ukuqonda okucacileyo kweemvakalelo ezingenakuthathekayo nokuba zilungele ukuba nazo, zimqinisekise. Ngaphandle kwengxelo yentsilelo, unokuvakalelwa kukuba iimvakalelo zakhe aziqondi. Kubalulekile ukusebenzisa amazwi, njengemizekelo engentla.
Nyaniso
Inyaniso ibhekisela kuvavanyo oluchanileyo kunye nokunyaniseka kwimeko kwaye enye indima yomntu ekuxazululeni ingxaki. Ingxelo enenjongo egxile kwi "it", kungekhona kwiimeko ezizimeleyo zelo. Ingabonakala ebuza okanye efuna into engenakwenzekayo, ingathathi inxaxheba okanye inxaxheba ekuxazululeni imbambano okanye nokuba ikunikeze "ngongoma-win". Inyaniso yenyaniso ithetha ukuphendula ngokucacileyo nangokunyanisekileyo kwimfuneko yakhe okanye ukuziphatha kwayo ngelixa ubeka uxanduva apho ikhona. Imizekelo ibandakanya, "Yiloo nto endiyenzayo," "Yiyo eya kwenzeka ..." kwaye "Khumbula ukuba kwenzeka ntoni ngaphambili kunye nendlela ozive ngayo kakubi ngayo emva koko."
Kubalulekile ukusebenzisa inkcazo kunye nenkcazo zentetho yokuqala ukuze ukwazi ukuva oko utshoyo, ngaphandle koko, isitatimenti senyaniso sinokuvalelwa njengenye inqatshelwe , ukudala ngakumbi, ukukhusela okanye umsindo.
Ukuqinisekiswa kunye nenkxaso ayivumelwanga
Xa uqala ukufunda nge-SET, kubonakala ngathi ucelwa ukuba uvumelane nomntu ophethe i-BPD. Kubalulekile ukucacisa ukuba ukuqinisekiswa kwemvakalelo akuthethi ukuba uyavumelana nabo, kuphela ukuba uyazi ukuba uyaziva. Indlela yokunxibelelana ekuxhasayo ayithethi ukuba uvumela i-BP ukuba ikhuphe; Kunoko, ugxininisa ukuthetha ngokunyanisekileyo kwaye uqinisekise ukuba uvalelwa, kungekhona nje ukuphendula kunye nokukhusela malunga noko kuthethwa.
Umthombo:
Kreger, R. "Iimfihlelo ze-SET" i-Psychology namhlanje, ngo-2013.