Iingcebiso zokuphucula ubuhlobo bakho boluntu
Ukwenza abahlobo kunye nokugcina ubuhlobo kunokuba ngumzabalazo kubantu abadala abane-ADHD . UCynthia Hammer, umqeqeshi we-MSW kunye nomqeqeshi we-ADHD, ubonelela ngolwalamano lwentlalo kunye ne- ADHD .
Kutheni Kunzima Ukugcina Abahlobo Xa Unayo i-ADHD
Ngoku kutshanje, isihloko esiphezulu kwiziko leendaba lidweliswe iindlela ezihlanu ezilungileyo zokufumana uvuyo ebomini . Into yokuqala ibhalwe kukuqwalasela iimfuno zabahlobo.
Ukuba unayo i-ADHD, sele uyazi ukuba mhlawumbi ufumana amanqaku aphantsi kule ndawo. Sibanjwe ebomini bethu, sinomngeni ngokuzama ukulawula konke okwenzekayo, ukuze sisoloko singakwazi ukucinga ngabanye nento esinokuyenza kubo, kusho uMammer.
Ubudlelwane beNtlalontle kunye ne-ADHD
Nazi ezinye izizathu zokuba uHammer uthi i-ADHD ingabangela ingxaki yokugcina abahlobo:
Ndiziva ndixakekile. Xa sigxininisekile, nokuba sicinga ngokukwenza enye into enye into eninzi. Ukuba le nto "enye into" yowomnye umntu, akunakwenzeka ukuba yenzeke kwi-skrini zethu ze-radar.
Kucinga ukuba akubalulekanga. Sizixelele izinto ezinje, "Akubalulekanga ukuba," "Abayi kubona ukuba andithumeli inqaku lokubonga ... thumela ikhadi lokuzalwa ... bacele ukuba babancome ngokuphumelela kwangoko. .noba yintoni." Ithuba lokubonisa umhlobo ukuba siyabakhathalela kwaye zibalulekile kuthi kuthiwa kuza ... kwaye iya .... kwaye senze kwakhona, okanye mhlawumbi AKAWENZIWA kwakhona. Abahlobo abangaziva bengavunyelwa kwaye bawazisa rhoqo rhoqo banokuwela emgceni njengoko bezibuza, "Yintoni ekhoyo kulobu budlelwane?"
Ukuqhatha. Umthengi wakutshanje wathi kum nandipha ukuba nabahlobo kodwa udla ngokubambile, bazive befuna isidlo. Ukufumanisa kunzima ukuhlala uhlala ujabulela inkampani yabo, uhlawule rhoqo, kwaye ubabone ngokunyanisekileyo.
Ukukhetha abantu. Umxhasi omnye, ngezinye izihlandlo, avumela enye into ukuba ibhekise phambili ekusebenzeni kwakhe ixesha. Ukhetha ukufunda ukusebenzisa ikhomputha yakhe entsha, njengoko oku kumthanda ngaphezu kokuya kwi-movie nomhlobo wakhe.
Ukuziphatha okungalungile. Ukungahambi kakuhle, ukuziphatha okungafaniyo, njengokusebenza njengokuba ufuna ukuba nomntu omnye kodwa ke ungafuni ukuwabona kwakhona ngeenyanga ezimbalwa akuyona indlela yokusingatha ubuhlobo . Umntu ekupheleni kokufumana lohlobo lobuhlobo unokuziva usebenzisekile kwaye ucinge ukuba udibana naye xa ungenanto engcono yokuyenza.
Imemori engafanelekanga. Umngeni ongezelelweyo kubaninzi abane-ADHD imemori engafanelekanga. Ziziphi amagama omntwana wakho omathathu onomhlobo? Ngubani obangelwe ukuba nomntwana? Ukuxelelwa ezi ntlobo zeenkcukacha kunye nokuba ungabhekiseli kubo kwiingxoxo ezizayo kubangela isikhubekiso esikhulu ekudaleni ubudlelwane obude. Abantu bafuna ukuzivakalelwa kukuba zibalulekile, ukuba imisebenzi yabo kunye nempumelelo kunye nokwehluleka kwabo kwabelwana kwaye baxabiswa ngabahlobo babo. Abahlobo abahlala besithi, "Andikhumbuli ukuba" okanye "Ndilibale wena undixelele ukuba" kunika ingcamango yokuba abazange banyamekele ukukhumbula.
Ukuphepha izihloko ezibalulekileyo kubahlobo bakho. Ukuba ugwema izihloko ezithile ngenxa yokuba awukhumbuli ulwazi oluphambili, uza kufumana nzima ukwenza ubuhlobo besikhathi eside. Xa ungeke ukwazi ukwabelana ngememori kunye neenkcukacha zamaxesha akho kunye, unika ingcamango yokuba unomdla okwenene kubahlobo bakho kwaye awuxabisi ubuhlobo babo.
Iindlela zokuphucula ubudlelwane beNtlalontle
Ngokutsho kweHammer, lawa ma nyathelo onokuyithatha ukuphucula ubuhlobo bakho:
- Lumka. Isinyathelo sokuqala sokuphucula intsebenziswano yoluntu kukuba uqaphele into oyenzayo eyingozi. Zihlole. Ngaba uphulaphule ngokwenene okanye uhlala ulinde uze ubeke iikopi zakho ezimbini? Ukuba kunjalo, zenzele ukuzibophezela, ukuba ngenyanga ezayo, uza kugxininisa ngokupheleleyo ekubeni ngumphulaphuli- uyakukhupha ngoku. Ukuba uthetha nantoni na, kuya kuba kuphela ukubuza umbuzo olula, omfutshane ukucacisa okanye ukwandisa oko isithethi esithethayo.
- Phinda uphinde. Ukuba uphulaphule omnye umntu omnye, ngamanye amaxesha umbuze ukuba unokwenza umxelele oko wakuvile akutshoyo, uze wenze njalo, ngokukhawuleza. Ungongezi nantoni na. Mnike ithuba lokuba akuxelele ukuba uyayiqonda kakuhle into ayithethayo kwaye umvumele ukuba aqhubeke xa ubuyela kwindlalifa yakho njengomphulaphuli omhle. Ziqhelise, zenze, zisebenzise ezi zakhono.
- Musa ukuphazamisa. Ngaba uphazamisa abanye? Kwakhona, ukuqaphela kuyintloko. Ziqaphele ngokwakho ekusebenzisaneni kwakho. Ukuba uphazamisa, thabatha amanyathelo okumisa. Xa uziva unxungulo oluzayo, thatha amanzi, yenza inqaku, uthathe umoya ophelileyo kwaye ubambelele okwesibili, okanye ucinge, "phumula." Musa ukuphazanyisa, kwaye xa wenza, khawuleza uqaphele, xolisa ngokuphazamisa, kwaye ukhuthaze isithethi ukuba siqhubeke.
- Gcina kwisihloko esisezantsi. Ukuba unomdla wokutshintsha isihloko kwaye uhambe kwi-tangent engahambelani, qaphela kwaye uziyeke. Abantu abayixabanga kwaye abayi kuwujonga ngobubele.
- Cinga ukuba uxabisa kangakanani ubuhlobo bakho. Kwiingxaki ezinkulu - ukungabhatali ngokufanelekileyo kunye nokuqwalasela okuqhubekayo kubangani bakho-cinga ngendlela ofuna ukuphucula ngayo ubudlelwane bakho. Uxabisa kangakanani ukuba nobuhlobo obuhle kunye nantoni na ozimisele ukuyenza ukuze uwagcine kwaye uwagcine? Ubuhlobo obuhle abukwenzeka nje kuphela. Bathetha ukunyamekela nokunyamekela. Ngaba uzimisele ukwenza okuyimfuneko? Ngaba uza kuba nobuhlobo obuhle kunye nobudlelwane obuphambili? Xa unokhetho phakathi kokufunda malunga nekhompyutheni yakho entsha kwaye uya kwi-movie kunye nomhlobo, ngaba uya kubeka ixabiso eliphezulu ukuya kwi-movie ngenxa yokufumana ixesha elide? Okukhethiweyo kukukho.
- Beka izicwangciso ezikhoyo ukuze ukhulise ubuhlobo bakho. Xa uthetha nomhlobo, yenza izicwangciso zakho ngexesha elizayo uza kufumana kunye, uzibophezele ngokuzimeleyo, uze uzifumane kwikhalenda yakho. Funda ukusebenzisa inkqubo ekhompyutheni eya kukukhumbuza imihla ebalulekileyo njengemihla yokuzalwa, imikhosi, njl. Fumana lonke ulwazi loqhagamshelwano lwabahlobo bakho ababhaliswe. Thenga amakhadi aqinisekisiwe kunye nezitampu ukuba ube khona ukwenzela ukuba ukhumbule lula ukuzalwa kunye nemikhosi. Xa uthengisa, khetha izinto ezifanelekileyo ongazisebenzisa njengezipho ezingalindelekanga kubahlobo bakho. Thenga amathikithi komnye umsebenzi uze ubacele ukuba bahambe nawe.
- Vumela abahlobo bakho bazi ukuba bathetha ntoni kuwe. Ngenjongo yokubatshela ukuba ubuxabisa kangakanani ubuhlobo babo, ubuninzi bokuzonwabisa kunye nexesha ochitha kunye kunye, ubunjani obulindelekileyo kwisiganeko oza kuhamba kunye kuzo. Ungavumeli ixesha elide lihambe ngaphandle kokuthintana nalabo obunobungane obaluxabisayo.
Ukujongana neNkumbulo engalunganga
Ngelishwa, imemori encinane ayiyi kuhamba, ithi uMammer. Nazi izicwangciso zakhe zokunciphisa impembelelo:
- Yenza amanqaku kubangani bakho - okuthandayo nokungathandekiyo, iimfuno zabo, ubudlelwane babo obalulekileyo kunye nemisebenzi - kwaye bahlaziywe ngaphambi kokuhlangana kwakho okulandelayo.
- Bhalisa kwinkonzo eya kuthumela amakhadi okuzalwa, njl njl. Unokumisela unyaka wonke ngexesha elinye.
- Xa ufunda amagama omakhelwane abatsha, bhala phantsi uze uwahlolisise ngamanye amaxesha.
- Lungiselela ngaphambi kokuba udibane nomntu ongeyiboni. Buza malunga noko uwaziyo kubalulekile kubo kwaye kwenzekani kubomi babo. Bonisa ukuba ukhumbule iinkcukacha ezibalulekileyo zezinto abakutshilo.
Khumbula, Unemibuzo yokunikela
Abantu abane-ADHD baninzi ukufaka isandla ekuthandaneni-inzondelelo yakho, ubuchule bakho, amandla akho, ukuhleka kwakho. Ungavumeli ukukhanya kwakho kufihle phantsi kwebhasi xa abanye benganikeli ithuba lokuba bazi kangcono. Ngokufunda nokusebenzisa iindlela ezilula zokusebenzisana kwentlalo, uya kuba usendleleni eya kubundlelwane obuhle kunye nokunikezelwa kwamano obalulekileyo.
> Umthombo:
> Cynthia Hammer, MSW. Udliwano-ndlebe / ibhalelwano. Matshi 25, 2008.