Ukuxhaswa kwezenhlalakahle ngokuqhelekileyo kubonwa njengento ebalulekileyo yobudlelwane obuqinile kunye nempilo engqongqo yengqondo, kodwa kuthetha ukuthini ngempela? Okubalulekileyo, ukuxhaswa kwezenhlalakahle kubandakanya ukuthungelwano lweentsapho kunye nabahlobo onokuthi ujikelele kwixesha leemfuno. Ingaba ujongene nobunzima bakho kwaye ufuna uncedo olukhawulezayo okanye ufuna ukuchitha ixesha kunye nabantu abakhathalelayo, olu lwalamano ludlala indima ebalulekileyo kwindlela osebenza ngayo kwimini yakho yemihla ngemihla.
Inkxaso yezenhlalakahle ezakha abantu ngexesha loxinzelelo kwaye kaninzi kubanika amandla okuqhubeka nokukhula. Kodwa inkxaso yezenhlalakahle ngokuqinisekileyo ayiyiyo enye indlela. Ukongeza ekuthembeleni kwabanye, usebenza njengendlela yokuxhasa abantu abaninzi ebomini bakho.
Ukubaluleka kokufumana iNethiwekhi yeNkxaso yeNtlalo enamandla
Iingcali zengqondo kunye nezinye iingcali zempilo yengqondo zidla ngokuthetha ngokubaluleka kokunxibelelana kwenethiwekhi. Xa sizama ukufikelela iinjongo zethu okanye ukujongana neengxaki, iingcali zihlala zicela abantu ukuba bathembele kubahlobo babo kunye nosapho ukuze baxhaswe. Uphando luye lwabonisa ukudibanisa phakathi kobudlelwane boluntu kunye nemibandela eyahlukeneyo yempilo kunye nokuphila kakuhle.
Ukuxhaswa kwezempilo ezingekho phantsi kuye kwaxhaswa kwixinzelelo kunye nesizungu kuboniswe ukwandisa umngcipheko wokudakumba, ukuzibulala, ukusetyenziswa kotywala, isifo senhliziyo kunye nokuguqulwa komsebenzi wengqondo.
Kwisifundo esinye samadoda angama-middle-middle angaphezu kweminyaka engama-7 ubudala, abo abanenkxaso enzulu yentlalo kunye neengqondo babengenakufa kunabo babengenalo ubudlelwane obunjalo.
Ngoko, yiziphi iinkalo zentlalo yoluntu ezibaluleke kakhulu kwimpilo? Kwenzeka njani ukuba iindawo zethu zentlalo zithintele njani impilo yethu yonke?
Umphandi uSheldon Cohen waseCarnegie Mellon University unikezela ukuba kukho izinto ezimbini ezibalulekileyo zehlabathi zezentlalo ezithintela empilweni: inkxaso yentlalo kunye nokuhlanganiswa kwentlalo.
Inkxaso yeNtlalo
Inkxaso yentlalo ibhekisela kwizibonelelo zengqondo kunye nezinto eziphathekayo ezibonelelwe ngenethwekhi yentlalo ejoliswe ekuncedeni umntu ukuba akwazi ukujamelana noxinzelelo. Uncedo olunjalo lwentlalo luya kufana ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo. Ngamanye amaxesha kunokuquka ukunceda umntu ngemisebenzi eyahlukeneyo imihla ngemihla xa begula okanye enika uncedo lwezemali xa beswele. Kwezinye iimeko, kunokubandakanya ukunika iingcebiso kumhlobo xa bejamelene nesimo esinzima. Kwaye ngamanye amaxesha kubandakanya ukunyamekela, ukuva novelwano kunye nokuxhalabisa abathandekayo abanesidingo.
U hla nganiso
Intsebenziswano yentlalontle inxaxheba ngokuthe ngqo kwiintlobo ezahlukeneyo zobudlelwane boluntu, ukususela ekusebenzisaneni okuthandana nobudlelwane. Ukuhlanganiswa kubandakanya ukuvakalelwa , ukuthandana, kunye nomoya wokuba ngamaqela ahlukeneyo asekuhlaleni, njengokuba yinxalenye yentsapho, intsebenziswano, intlalo yoluntu, okanye uluntu lwentlalo. Iingcali zibonisa ukuba ukudibanisa kulwalamano olunxulumene noluntu kunika inzuzo ekhuselekileyo yokuziphatha kakubi kunye neempembelelo zempilo.
Khangela ngakumbi iindidi zeNkxaso yeNtlalo
Unxibelelwano lwezentlalo zentlalo zinokuza kwiifom ezahlukeneyo kwaye zidlala indima ezahlukileyo ebomini bakho.
Ngamanye amaxesha abantu ebomini bakho banikela inkxaso ngenkxaso . Bakubuyisela xa ufuna, kwaye kukho ihlombe ukukhala xa izinto zingahambi. Olu hlobo lenkxaso lunokubaluleka ngokukhethekileyo ngexesha loxinzelelo okanye xa abantu beziva bebuhlungu.
Kwezinye iimeko, abantu kwi-intanethi yezonxibelelwano zentlalo banokunika inkxaso ngenkxaso . Banyamekela iimfuno zakho zomzimba kwaye banike isandla sokunceda xa ufuna. Oku kunokubandakanya ukuzisa ukutya okutshisayo xa ugula okanye kukunika ukukhwela xa imoto yakho isesitolo.
Inkxaso enjalo ibalulekile xa abantu befuna iimfuno ezikhawulezileyo kufuneka ziqwalaselwe.
Abantu banokubonelela ngolwazi olwaziwayo njengenkxaso yolwazi . Oku kungabandakanya ukubonelela ngcebiso, iingcebiso, ulwazi kunye nokucebisa. Inkxaso enjalo ingabalulekile xa wenza izigqibo okanye utshintsho olukhulu ebomini bomntu. Ngokufumana le ndlela yokuxhaswa, abantu banokuziva bexhalabele kwaye bexinezelekile ngeengxaki abazama ukuzisombulula ngenxa yengcebiso yomhlobo othembekileyo, umcebisi okanye othandekayo.
Njengoko unokucinga, abantu kwiintanethi zakho zentlalo banokuthatha iindima ezahlukileyo. Utitshala unokunika inkxaso ngenkcazelo, ngelixa umzali anganikela zonke iintlobo ezintathu. Ngokufumana inethiwekhi yokuxhaswa kwentlalo, unako ukufumana uhlobo lwenkxaso oyifunayo xa uyifunayo ngokwenene.
Indlela iNkxaso YezeNtlalontle Izuza Ngayo Impilo Yethu
Ngoku ngoku siqonda ukuba iinkqubo zethu zenkxaso yentlalo zibandakanya iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zenkxaso yoluntu kunye nokudibanisa kumaqela ahlukeneyo asekuhlaleni, kufike ixesha lokujonga ngokuthe ngqo ukuba olu lwalamano lwentlalontle luchaphazela njani emzimbeni nasengqondweni.
Zincinci nje ezimbalwa iingeniso zokuxhamla kwentlalo ziquka.
Amaqela ezentlalo angakhuthaza ukhetho olufanelekileyo kunye nokuziphatha. Ukuthatha inxaxheba kumaqela oluntu kunempembelelo evamile ekuziphatheni, ngokuqhelekileyo kubangele ukuba abantu badla ukutya okunempilo, ukuzivocavoca, ukutshaya, ukusela, okanye ukusebenzisa izinto ezingekho mthethweni. Ngokucacileyo, amaqela ezentlalo maxa wambi angenempembelelo embi kule nkalo xa uxinzelelo lwabaontanga kunye nempembelelo kukhokelela kwimpilo engalunganga okanye eyingozi. Nangona kunjalo, uxinzelelo lweqela kunye nenkxaso inokukhokelela abantu ukuba bahlanganyele kwimilinganiselo enempilo ngokunjalo.
Ukuba unake wazama ukuyeka umkhuba ombi, njengokutshaya, mhlawumbi uyazi ukuba kubaluleke kangakanani le nkxaso yenhlalakahle. Ukuba unxibelelwano lwakho loluntu alukuxhasi ukuba ufezekise injongo yakho, kunokukwenza izinto zibe nzima nakakhulu. Nangona kunjalo, ngaba bakho abahlobo kunye nosapho bakho banikela ngenkxaso kunye nokukhuthazwa, unokufumanisa ukuba ufezekisa injongo yakho yokuyeka umkhwa nokuphucula impilo yakho kunokwenzeka.
Ukuxhaswa kwezenhlalakahle kunceda abantu bajamelana kangcono noxinzelelo Ukuxhaswa kwezenhlalakahle kunceda abantu banxinzelele uxinzelelo. Ingcinezelo iboniswe ukuba ibe nemiphumo emibi yempilo evela ekukhuselweni okunciphise ukufumana ingozi yesifo senhliziyo. Ukuzungezwe ngabantu abanenkathalo kunye nenkxaso kubancedisa abantu ukuba bazibonele bengcono ukujongana noxinzelelo olubomi. Uphando luye lwabonisa ukuba ukuxhaswa komelele kwentlalo ngexesha leengxaki kunokuncedisa ukunciphisa imiphumo yokuphazamiseka okubangelwa ngengozi, kuquka i-PTSD.
Ukuxhaswa kwezenhlalakahle kunokuphucula izizathu. Ulwalamano loluntu lunokunceda abantu ukuba bahlale bekhuthazwa xa bezama ukufezekisa iinjongo zabo. Abantu abazama ukunciphisa umzimba okanye ukuyeka ukutshaya bafumana ukuba kunceda ukudibanisa nabantu abazama ngamandla ukufikelela ezi njongo. Ukuthetha nabantu abachaphazelekayo ngamava ngokuqhelekileyo bangaba ngumthombo wenkxaso, uvelwano kunye nokukhuthaza.
Ngokucacileyo, ubudlelwane bethu boluntu luba nendima ebalulekileyo kwimpilo yethu yonke nenhlalakahle, kodwa unokwenza ntoni ukuphucula intlalo yakho yentlalo? Qinisekisa ukujonga ezi ngcebiso eziphezulu malunga nendlela yokudibana nabantu abatsha nokwenza ubuhlobo obutsha , ezinye zeenzuzo ezinzulu zobungane, kunye neendlela ezahlukeneyo zokujongana nesizungu .
> Imithombo:
> Cohen, S. Ubuhlobo boluntu kunye nempilo. Iingcali zeMilo zaseMerika. 2004; 58 (8): 676-684. http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/0003-066X.59.8.676.
> Grav, S., Hellzen, O., Romild, U., & Stordal, E. Umbutho phakathi kokuxhaswa kwentlalo kunye nokudakumba kubemi jikelele: Uvavanyo lwe-HUNT, uphando lwe-cross-sectional. Umbhalo we-Nursing Nursing. 2012; 21 (1-2): 111-120. i-doi: 10.1111 / j.1365-2702.2011.03868.x.
> Rosengren, A., Orth-Gomomer, K., Wedel, H., & Wilhelmsen, L. (1993). Iziganeko zobomi ezixinezelekileyo, inkxaso yentlalo, kunye nokufa kwabantu abazalwa ngowe-1933. IBritish Medical Journal. 1993; 307 (6912): 1102-1105.
> ISouthwick SM, i-Vythilingam M, uCharney DS. I-psychobiology yokudandatheka kunye nokunyamezela kwengcinezelo: Impembelelo yokukhusela kunye nokonyango. Annu Rev Clin Psychol. 2005: 1: 255-91.