Amanqaku kaRubin wokuthandwa noLuthando

Ukulinganisa ukuthandana

Abaphandi baye bathetha iindidi ezahlukeneyo zeengcamango ukuqonda uhlobo luthando, kwaye abaninzi baye bazama ukwenza iindlela zokulinganisa iimvakalelo ezinjalo. Kwakuyi- psychologist psychologist Zick Rubin owayengomnye wabaphandi bokuqala ukuvelisa isixhobo esenzelwe ukulinganisa uthando.

Ngokutsho kukaRubin, uthando lothando lwenziwa ngezinto ezintathu:

1. Isiqhotyoshelweyo: Imfuno yokunyamekelwa kwaye ibe nomnye umntu. Ukuqhagamshelana nomzimba kunye nokuvunywa kwimiba ebalulekileyo yezinto eziqhotyoshelweyo.
2. Ukunyamekela: Ukuxabisa ulonwabo lomntu kunye neemfuno zakho ngokwakho.
3. Ulwalamano: Ukuxelela iingcamango zangasese, iimvakalelo kunye neminqweno nomnye umntu.

Ngokusekelwe kulo mbono wothando lomthandane, uRubin wavelisa imibuzo emibili ukulinganisa ezi ziguquko. Ekuqaleni, uRubin wafumanisa imibuzo engama-80 eyenzelwe ukuvavanya isimo sengqondo umntu aphetheyo ngabanye.

Imibuzo yahlulwa ngokubhekiselele ukuba ingaba yayingabonakali okanye iyakuthanda. Ezi zihloko ezimbini zeemviwo zaqala ukulawulwa kwabafundi be-198 bakubafundi bokuqala kunye nokuhlaziywa kwezinto kwaqhutyelwa. Iziphumo zavumela uRubin ukuba achaze imibuzo engama-13 'yokuthanda' kunye nemibuzo engama-13 ethi 'uthando' eyayizinyathelo ezinokuthenjelwa kwezi zimbini.

Imibuzo ekuthandeni kukaRubin noLungile

Imizekelo elandelayo ifana neminye yemibuzo esetyenziswe kuBukan's Liking and Loving Scale:

Izinto Ukulinganisa Ukuthandwa

1. Ndiziva ukuba _____________ ngumntu ozinzile.
2. Ndiyathemba ngeengcinga ze ______________.
3. Ndicinga ukuba ______________ idla ngokulungelelaniswa kakuhle.
4. __________ ungomnye wabantu abathanda kakhulu endaziyo.

Izinto Ukulinganisa Uthando

1. Ndiziva ndiziva ndiba namandla kwi ____________.

1. Ndiyathanda xa __________ idibana kum.
2. Ndingenza phantse nayiphi na into _____________.
3. Ndiyifumana kulula ukuyihoxisa iimpazamo ze __________.

Uphando lukaRubin Ngombono Wakhe Wothando

Isikali sikaRubin sokuthandana nesothando sinike inkxaso ngenkcazo yakhe yothando. Kwisifundo ukuqinisekisa ukuba izikali zahlula ngokwenene phakathi kokuthanda nokuthanda, uRubin wabuza inani labathathi-nxaxheba ukuba bazalise imibuzo yakhe ngokusekelwe kwindlela abavakalelwa ngayo malunga neqabane kunye nomhlobo omhle . Iziphumo zityhila ukuba abahlobo abalungileyo bafumana amanqaku aphezulu kwizinga elithandayo, kodwa kuphela abanye ababalaseleyo balinganisela phezulu kwizikali zothando.

Ngophando lwakhe, uRubin wafumanisa ubuninzi beempawu ezahlukileyo phakathi kwamadidi ahlukeneyo othandana. Ngokomzekelo, wafumanisa ukuba abathathi-nxaxheba abavakalisa phezulu kwizinga lokuthanda nabo bachitha ixesha elininzi ixesha bejonga ngelinye ilanga xa beqhathaniswa nalabo bavakalisa nje ukuba bathandane.

Uthando aluwona umqondo okhonkco kwaye ngoko kunzima ukulinganisa. Nangona kunjalo, izikali zikaRubin zokuthanda kunye nothando zinika indlela yokulinganisa ukuvakalelwa kwintando yothando. Ngomnyaka we-1958, isazi sengqondo sengqondo uHarry Harlow sicetyise ukuba "ukuthanda okanye ukuthandana, iingcali zeengqondo ziye zahluleka kwiinjongo zabo.

Into encinane esiyayaziyo ngothando ayigqithisi ukubonwa okulula, kwaye encinci esiyibhalayo ngayo ibhalwe ngcono ngongomazi kunye neenveli. "

Uphando lukaRubin lubonakalise isinyathelo esibalulekileyo ekuqhubeni kwethu ukuqonda uthando lothando kunye nokwenza indlela yophando olusasa kule ngongoma.

_Iingxelo:

_{Harlow, HF (1958). Ubume bothando. I-American Psychologist, 13, 673-685.}

_{URubin, uZick. Ngowe-1970. Ukulinganisa uthando lothando. Umbhalo woBuntu kunye neNzululwazi yeNtlalo, 16, 265-273.}