Abantu abanentlonelo abaneempawu ezikhethekileyo ezibahlukanisa. Le nto ingaba yinto entle, kodwa nayo inokungaphumeleli kwayo. Nantsi into omele ukwazi ngayo ngokuba ngumntu onomdla kakhulu, okanye ujongene nomnye.
Uphi umntu ovelele kakhulu?
Ngaba uke watshelwa ukuba "unomdla" okanye ukuba "akufanele ucinge kakhulu," ingakumbi ngabantu abakubetha njengobunzima okanye ngubani mhlawumbi omele acinge kancinci?
Unokuba yinto eyaziwa ngokuba "ngumntu okhutheleyo."
Ngezinye iindidi ezinokuthi, ngezinye iinkhathi zibizwa ngokuba "yi-empath" kwaye ngezinye iindidi zeklinikhi ezi zihlandlo ngamanye amaxesha zibhekiswa njengento enobuchule bokusingathwa kwenqondo, okanye i-SPS efutshane. Abantu banokuba babethi "banobuhlungu" okanye "babenomdla" ngaphambili kwaye babhekisela njengento engafanelekiyo, kodwa oku akusibi nakona nje ngokuba ngumntu wobuntu obangela amandla kunye nemingeni.
Ewe, kunokwenzeka ukuba ukhutshwe ngokukhawuleza ngabantu abangenalo nzakalo okanye ngubani ozama konke okusemandleni ukuba abe nomusa. Ngokufanayo, kunokwenzeka ukuba uphazamise ukunyanzeliswa kwimihla ngemihla okanye ulwalamano oluthile, ngokukodwa xa uba ngumsindo njengempendulo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba ngumntu okhutheleyo (okanye i-HSP ngenxa yobunzima) akuthethi ukuba uthetha iinjongo ezimbi kubantu xa bengekho; Kungakumbi ukuba uyaziqonda ngokulula, okanye unokuchaphazeleka ngakumbi kwiimeko ezimbi, okungekho ebuthathaka.
Ukuba uyazi indlela yokulawula iimpawu ezizodwa zokuba yi-HSP, unokuyenza ibe namandla ngakumbi kwaye ungaphantsi kobunzima ebomini bakho. Ukwenza oku, kunceda ukuqonda into ojongene nayo, nokuba uyazifunda wena okanye uzama ukwakha ukuqonda okunzulu komntu ebomini bakho onokuba novalo.
Ziyintoni Eziqhelekileyo Ngabantu Abaphakamileyo Abanomdla?
Iingcali zeengqondo u-Elaine Aron no-Arthur Aron, indoda kunye nomfazi womnye, baqulunqa igama elithi HSP kuma-1990 kwaye bafunde ngokubanzi kwaye bapapashwe ngesihloko. Bafumene ukuba ii-HSP zakha malunga nama-15 ukuya kuma-20 ekhulwini labemi bonke, ngoko-ke abangekho njengenqabile kunokuba bezinye ivakalelwa.
Oko kwathiwa, le ndlela yindlela engaphantsi kwayo, kwaye uluntu lwethu luyakhiwa malunga nabantu abaqaphele ngaphantsi kwaye bachaphazeleka kakhulu. Ngoko ke, kunceda ukuqaphela ukungafani nokwenza utshintsho lokunciphisa uxinzelelo olunokufikelela kumazinga aphezulu kwi-HSP. Oku kuyinyaniso kwabo baziwayo njengabaxhalabisayo kakhulu kunye nalabo abanomntu abathandayo umntu ovelele ngakumbi kunomntu oqhelekileyo.
Indlela yokuchonga umntu oPhezulu kakhulu
Ubukhulu bobutyebi busebenza kwiintlobo ezimbalwa ezahlukeneyo. Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba ukuba i-HSP ayithethi ukuba unesimo sokuxilonga okanye nayiphi na into enjalo; luphawu lomntu olubandakanya ukwandiswa kwempendulo kwizinto zombini ezintle neziphumo ezimbi. Kukho iimpawu okanye iimpawu ezininzi eziqhelekileyo kwi-HSPs. Ngokutsho kwabaphandi abaye bachaze le ndlela yobuntu, yintoni okumele bayifunwe.
- Ukuxhatshazwa ngesohlwayo njengezihlwele ezinomsindo, izibane ezikhanyayo, okanye izambatho ezingenakunqwenelekayo
- Uvakalelwa imfuneko yokuphepha i-movie okanye ubudlelwane be-tv ngenxa yokuba ziziva zikhulu kwaye zikushiye uzive ungenakunyakaziswa
- Ukuziva kungekhona nje ukukhetha, kodwa imfuneko yokuba ixesha eliphantsi, ngokukodwa xa unemihla yokuhamba; efuna ukubuyela kwindawo emnyama, elinezolileyo
- Ukuchukumiseka kakhulu ngobuhle, kuboniswe ngobuciko, ubunjani, okanye umoya womntu, okanye ngamanye amaxesha kunye neentengiso ezilungileyo
- Ukuba nobomi obutyebileyo obuyinkimbinkimbi, gcwalisa iingcamango ezinzulu kunye neemvakalelo ezinamandla ezihamba nazo
Ukuchonga ngokugqithiseleyo okanye "olusemthethweni," kukho umbuzo wemibuzo yaba bantu abaphandi abaphuhlisayo ukunceda abantu bazibonele njenge-HSPs, eyaziwa ngokuba yi-questionnaire ye-Aron's Highly Sensitive People Scale (HSPS) kwaye iyafumaneka kwiwebhusayithi yabo.
Indlela abantu abavakalelwa ngayo abajongene nokuxinezeleka
Akumangalisi ukuba abantu abanentlonelo bahlala bexinezeleke ngezinto ezininzi abantu abajamelana nazo iingcinezelo, kunye nezinto ezimbalwa ezinokuthi zikhuphe abanye abantu. Uxinzelelo lwezenhlalakahle, olubonakala lubangele ukuhlawula abantu abaninzi kunezinye iintlobo zengcinezelo, lunokuthi lugxininise ngakumbi umntu onokuqonda indlela eyahlukileyo yokungahambi kakuhle kwimpikiswano, umzekelo, okanye unokubona ubundlobongela okanye uxinzelelo apho abanye a nga yiboni. Nazi izinto ezimbalwa ezizodwa ezinokubangela uxinzelelo kakhulu.
Iishedyuli zeHectic: Akusiwo wonke umntu othanda ukuxakeka kakhulu, kodwa abanye abantu baphumelela kwintlalo kunye nokunyanzelisa ubomi obuxakekileyo. I-HPSs, ngakolunye uhlangothi, ziziva ziphazamisekile kwaye "zixubene" xa zininzi kakhulu ukwenza kwithuba elincinci, nangona ukuba zinexesha elaneleyo lokwenza konke ukuba zenzeke xa zikhawuleza. Isidingo sokugubungela ukungaqiniseki mhlawumbi singakwazi ukwenza konke kusebenze, kwaye uxinzelelo lweemeko ezinjalo luvakalelwa kakhulu.
Ukulindela kwabanye: Abantu abaxhamlileyo bavame ukuthabatha iimfuno neemvakalelo zabanye. Bazithiyile ukuyeka abantu. Ukufunda ukuthi hayi inselele kwaye kuyimfuneko ye-HSPs kuba banokuziva bazichohliwe yiimfuno zabanye, ingakumbi kuba banokuziva badidekile ngabahlobo babo ukuba i-HSP ifuna ukuthi hayi okanye ayikwazi ukwenza oko kulindeleke kubo. Bavame ukuba ngabagxeki babo ababi kakhulu, kwaye banokuziva banembopheleleko yolonwabo lwabanye, okanye ubuncinane bayazi kakuhle xa kukho imvakalelo emibi ejikelezayo.
Iimbambano: Njengoko kubonisiwe, i-HSPs inokuba nzima ukugxininiswa yimpikiswano kuba iyakwazi ngakumbi xa kukho inkathazo ekuzaleni ubudlelwane, kubandakanyeka xa izinto zivakalelwa "encinci" kunye nomntu onokungaxeli kukho ingxaki.
Baya kuba neengxaki zoxinzelelo loluntu ngokunjalo. Bangavakalelwa iimvakalelo ezimbi zomnye umntu kunye neemvakalelo zabo, kwaye banokuzifumana ngokugqithiseleyo nangakumbi kunabanye. Bayazi ngakumbi zombini amathuba okuphucula izinto, kunye nokuphazamiseka xa iziphumo ezintle zikwazi ukufumana iziphumo ezingalunganga ziqhutywe ngongqukuva. Basenokubandezeleka xa beqonda ukuba ubudlelwane budlulile, beziva ukuba izinto ziye zagqitywa, kanti omnye umntu unokuziva ukuba akukho nto enokuyenza kwaye uhambe. Ubuthathaka obunokuziva buvakalelwa kukuba lulahleke ngakumbi, kwaye lubandakanye ukuhluthwa .
Ukunyamezela : Abaqeqeshi bokuphila babhekisela kuloo mithombo yamanzi yansuku zonke esinazo "ukunyamezela," njengokuba "ezintweni esizibekezelayo" ezibangela uxinzelelo kwaye azikho mfuneko. Iziphazamiso zinokuziva zikhungathekile kakhulu kwi-HSP ozama ukugxila, umzekelo, okanye ukucola kwindlu kwindlu enokuthi ivakalelwe ngakumbi kwaye iyancipha ngakumbi i-HSP kwikhaya elibi. Bakhawuleza bahlaziyeke ngokumangalisa. Baye "baxhoma" xa belambile-abayinyamezeli. Ngale ndlela, iingcinezelo zobomi zemihla ngemihla zidibanisa ukukhungatheka ngakumbi kwintlungu.
Ukungaphumeleli kobuqu: Njengoko kuthethwe, i-HSPs zabo zigxeke kakhulu. Oko kuthetha ukuba baninzi ukuxhamla kunye nokuzithemba. Baya kukhumbula ixesha elide ukuba benza iphosakelo ehlazo, baze bazive benetloni ngaphezu kwaloo mntu oqhelekileyo. Abayithandi ukubukelwa nokuvavanywa xa bezama into enzima, kwaye banokudibanisa ngenxa yoxinzelelo lokubukelwa. Bahlala bephelela ngokugqibeleleyo, kodwa banokuqonda ngokubanzi iindlela ezixinzelelekileyo zokuzixinzelela kunye nokuba zichaphazela njani.
Ukunyanzeliswa ngokujulile: Ukuziva izinto ezinzulu kakhulu zineengxaki. Abantu abanentlonelo bavame ukuvakalelwa ngokunyanisekileyo ngobuhle abababonayo. Baye baziwa ngokukhala ngelixa bebukela iividiyo ezikhuthazayo malunga neentshukumo ze-YouTube, kwaye banokuziva bazive beziva abanye, bobabini bebi kwaye bahle. Banyamekela kakhulu ngabahlobo babo kwaye bathambekele ekudibaneni izibophelelo ezinzulu nabantu abalungileyo. Bayixabisa ngokwenene iwayini elungileyo, isidlo esihle, ingoma enhle, kunye nezinto ezininzi ezintle ebomini kwinqanaba abaninzi abantu abakwazi ukufikelela kuzo. Bangavakalelwa ngakumbi bekhona, kodwa nabo banokuvakalelwa ngakumbi ngezinto abanalo ebomini, bazi ukuba mhlawumbi iphela kwaye akukho nto iqinisekile. Iingcingo zabo ziphantsi, kodwa ukuphakama kwabo kunakho ukuphakamisa.
Ukuxininiswa koxinzelelo kwi-Highly Sensitive
Isicwangciso sakho sokuncedisa uxinzelelo oluninzi njengomntu okhutheleyo unokubandakanya ukuzithengisa kwi-stimuli eninzi. Beka umqobo phakathi kwakho kunye nesenzo esichukumisayo esichukumisayo. Musa ukubukela iifilimu zee-movie ezidlulileyo. Hlalani kude nabantu abaye batshabalalise amandla akho, benze izidingo ezinzima, okanye uzive uziva kakubi ngawe. Funda ukuthi hayi ukufuna iimfuno ezikhulu kwaye uzive ulungile kunye nalo, kwaye wenze i-perimeter ebomini bakho. Yenza ikhaya lakho libe yindawo ehlaziyekileyo kwaye "indawo ephephile" ngokwabo. Yakha amava amnandi ngakumbi kwishedyuli yakho ukukugxotha kwixinzelelo engaphezulu ongayifumana nayo. Kwaye ngaphezu kwakho konke, yayazi izinto ezibangela ukuba uxinzelele kuwe , kwaye ufunde ukuphepha ezi zinto.
> Imithombo:
> Aron, E .; Aron, A .; Jagiellowicz, J. (2012). "Ubuchule bokusebenza ngokufanelekileyo: Ukuphononongwa ekukhanyeni kokuphendulwa kwemvelo". Ukuhlaziywa koBuntu kunye neNtlalo yeNtlalo. 16 (3): 262-282.
> ULiss, uMiriam; Mailloux, uJennifer; U-Erchull, u-Mindy J. (2008), "Ulwalamano oluphakathi kokuvalelwa kwengqondo, i-alexithymia, i-autism, ukuxinezeleka, kunye nokukhathazeka koPhando kunye noLwazi oluhlukeneyo, 45 (3): 255-259.
> Boterberg, Sofie; UWarreyn, uPetra (2016), "Ukuqonda yonke into: Impembelelo yentsebenziswano yokusebenza kwengqondo kwimihla ngemihla yokusebenza kwabantwana", Ubuntu kunye nokuhlukana komntu ngamnye, 92: 80-86.