Ngaba uyazibuza ukuba ubulili obungakanani obufanele ukuba bube nawo emtshatweni wakho? Ngaba uzibuza ukuba isondo esingakanani lanele? Okanye, ukuba "uqhelekileyo" uthelekiswa nabanye? Ngaba kunokube nenombolo yomlingo? Ngaphezu koko, kubaluleke kangakanani isondo? Ukuba ubuza le mibuzo, awuyedwa. Le mibuzo iqhelekileyo ibuzwa kwi-ofisi yeengcali zeembambano kunye neengcali zesondo .
Kusemngciphekweni ukukhankanya izibalo malunga nokwaneliseka ngokwesondo ngezizathu ezimbalwa. Oku kungenxa yokuba ubuninzi beenkcukacha zivela kwi-self-report-report survey, ngoko, ngokwenene asikho i-100% ethembele ngokuchanekileyo kweziphumo. Ngekubeni kubalulekile ukuba nenqaku lokuqala elibhekiselele kumaqela ahlukeneyo abantu (kuba yinto esenzayo njengezenzululwazi zentlalo), ngokuqhelekileyo akunjalo oko umntu enokukucela ...
Abantu banqwenela ukwazi ukuba ubuhlobo babo buphilile. Bazibuza ukuba ngaba banelungelo kumlingani wabo okanye ukuba iqabane lawo liwanele ngokwenene. Bazibuza ukuba "kuninzi" okanye, ngokuqhelekileyo, isondo "esincinci" siphumelelana nobudlelwane babo. Ngamanye amaxesha abahlali nje bebuza. Enyanisweni, bayesaba kukuba ubudlelwane babo bubungozi beli xhalaba.
Umbuzo malunga novalo lwezesondo luya kufika xa omnye umlingane engonelelwanga kakhulu ngelixa elichithwa kwigumbi lokulala.
Ukuba nomgangatho "onqwenelayo", apho iqabane elinye lifuna ngaphezulu okanye ngaphantsi komnye, luyinto eqhelekileyo phakathi kwabantu ababini ebudlelwaneni obuzimeleyo. Kungaba njalo ukuba abalingani bobabini abathandeki ngamaxesha apho benza khona ukusebenzisana ngokwesondo.
Kodwa iindaba ezilungileyo namhlanje, kukuba ukwaneliseka komtshato akukona nje umsebenzi wezoxhatshazo zesondo kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo akahlali ngesondo.
Enyanisweni, namhlanje iibini ezitshatileyo zijonge umgangatho wokusebenzisana kwabo ngokwesondo kwaye kungekhona nje ubungakanani .
Oko Uphando lusitshela
Okokuqala kunye nokuphambili, uphando olwenelisayo lomtshato luba neengxaki. Oku kudla ngenxa yoyilo lovavanyo okanye indlela ekuqokelelwa ngayo idatha. Nangona kunjalo, abantu basadinga into ethile njengendlela yokulinganisa, ngoko ke sinokubheka oko sikufumene:
- Kuphando lwe-90 uphando lwafumanisa ukuba i-40% yezibini zalala ngesithathu ngeeveki nganye, kwaye loo maxesha amaninzi ehla kunye nobude bomtshato.
- Ngokuqhelekileyo, kukho ukuhla kwezo zibini kunye nokwaneliseka njengoko izibini zidibene kunye.
- Izabelo zesondo zinciphisa ubudlelwane kunye nangona sicinga ezinye izinto ezinjengomsebenzi, imisebenzi, abantwana, izinto eziphathekayo okanye ezomzimba, ezinye izinto ezinxulumene nazo, njalonjalo.
- Ukuxhatshazwa ngokwesondo kunye nokwaneliseka ngokwesondo zihambelana ngokuthe ngqo kumanani omtshato. Ngamanye amagama, elinye izinga liphakama, elinye lihla.
- Inqaku lokuphanda elipapashwe ngoNovemba ka-2015 elibhekelele kwiibini ezitshatileyo ezingaphezu kwama-2400 zifumene ukuba i-sexual couple couple had, bavuya ngakumbi. Kuyathakazelisa, nangona kunjalo, kwakukho ikota yexesha elinye ngeveki.
Kutheni iCape Kanye ngeeVeki?
Esi sikhokhwa sinokujongwa njengelinganayo loqoqosho "nomthetho wokunciphisa imbuyekezo"; xa ungeze abaqeshwa abaninzi ukuba bafumane umsebenzi owenziwe kukho ukwanda kwimiqhamo ukuya kwinqanaba kwaye emva kokuba usebenzo lwendlela luyehla. Ngoko, isondo kanye okanye kabini kwinyanga asinako okwaneleyo kodwa ngaphezu kweyodwa ngeveki ayinjalo. Enyanisweni, kwelinye uphando olutshanje, izibini eziye zafundiswa ukuba ziphindwe kabini inani lokwabelana ngesondo zazingenanto ngakumbi kunabo babesenakho ngaphambili (kunye nomgangatho wabo wesondo). Ukongezelela, bavakalisa umdlalo wesini. Ngomthetho wokunciphisa ukubuyisela, kubonakala ngathi kuncitshiswa kakhulu kwisondo.
Siyazi ukuba ukwaneliseka ngokwesondo kulunge kwiinqanaba ezithile zobudlelwane. Siyazi nokuba ubomi buya endleleni. Kuye kwisiqabane ngasinye ukubeka umgangatho wabo siqu kwaye ulungile. Oku kukubaluleke kakhulu xa ucinga ukwaneliseka ngokwesini. Akukhona malunga nenombolo nganye, kodwa amava akho kweso nani.
Ababini abakhanyisa ukuba ngaba i-frequency yabo "eqhelekileyo" yinto eqhelekileyo yilabo abanokunganeliseki kwaye banokuba ngaba ngaphantsi kwekhalo. Nangona kunjalo kukho izibini, ngokuqhelekileyo, kodwa kungekho rhoqo, izibini ezitshatileyo kunye ezithe zahlala zitshatileyo, ezenzelwe ukulala ngokwesondo.
Echazwe Ngqwenela
Umnqweno ogqithisileyo unokuba yingxaki yangempela-kaninzi ngokuphindaphindiweyo kodwa ngamanye amaxesha kunye nekhwalithi.
Kulabo abanobudlelwane babo bobulili abanomngeni, kukho amanyathelo onokuthatha. Ngomnye, vavanya ulwalamano lwakho ngaphandle kwegumbi lokulala. Ngaba ufezekisana nolwalamano olusondeleyo-kokusondelana ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo kuyimfuneko ukuxhamla kwakho. Oku, kwindlela, kuya kubakhokelela ekuhlaleni. Naluphi na ulwimi lwenu luthando, nokuba lixesha elilodwa-nye, izipho, izenzo zenceba, amagama anomusa - uyayilondoloza. Ukuba ulwimi lwakho luthando kuphela lukwabelana ngesondo, kufuneka usebenze kule nto.
Ababambini abaneengcali basithethelela ngokuqhelekileyo izinto ezifana nokucwangcisa ngesondo, ukuguqula indawo, ukuhamba uhambo olude ukusuka kwintsapho, ukukhawuleza izinto okanye ukuphendula ngokutshatyalaliswa kwakho ngesondo. Ukucwangcisa ngesondo kusebenza kwabanye kwaye kungekhona abanye njengamanye amacebiso. Ngamazinga e-testosterone aphakamileyo kakhulu kusasa, oku kungenokuba kukho inketho kwabanye. Ukuba oko kungenakusebenza ekukhuliseni kwigumbi lokulala, ke ufuna uncedo lomgulana wezesondo, kodwa ngaphandle kokuqala ukulawula zonke izinto eziphathekayo okanye zomzimba.
Umnqweno wesondo unokuchaphazeleka ngezinto ezininzi:
- Sonyango
- Mayeza
- IHormones
- Ukuguga
- Iimbopheleleko zentsapho / abantwana
- Iingxaki zeengxaki okanye imiba yomzimba
- Iingcamango zesondo kunye nesimo sengqondo
- Ukukhangela
- Imiba yobudlelwane
- Imiba yengqondo ( ukudandatheka / ukuxhalaba)
- Ukukhathazeka kwemiba (umzekelo, indlela ovakalelwa ngayo malunga neqabane lakho ngaloo mzuzwana)
Ukuba unayo "i-spell eyomileyo," kwabanye, nje ukubandakanyeka ngesondo kunokukubuyisela kumdlalo. Kuya kufumana isigqi sakho kwakhona kwaye sisize ukuhamba kwee-hormones ezixhambile njenge-oxytocin kunye ne-vasopressin. Unako ukuvuselela nokulungisa ukutshatyalaliswa kwakho. Ekubeni ukusondelana kunye nobulili kudibaniswa, ngamanye amaxesha oku kukho konke ukuba isibini sifanele sibuyele endleleni.
Khumbula, akuyona inombolo ebalulekileyo kulabo abanomdla, kodwa intsingiselo yombuzo. Ukuhlala utshatile kunzima ngokwaneleyo kumxholo weengxaki zempilo kunye neziphazamiso zobomi. Le miqobo inokufudukela kwigumbi lokulala. Ngoko njengoko sihlala sizinikezele, okanye sitshatile, sinokuvuyisa nje ngesini esincinane. Umgangatho jikelele wobudlelwane uthatha kuqala ngaphezu kwegumbi lokulala. Ukuba unako ukukhwela okanye udansa ngeminyaka yesini, ungayenza.