Ifowuni? Indlela yokwazi Ukuba Unayo ifowuni yeFobia

Indlela yokulwa noyiko lwakho lokwenza iiFowuni

Ukuxhalaba kwefowuni kukuxhalaba phakathi kwabantu abaneengxaki zokuxhalaba kwabantu (SAD). Abantu abaninzi abanokuthanda ukuthetha kwifowuni, okanye banokuba "noyiko lwefowuni." Kodwa ukwesaba ukuthetha kwifowuni kunokwenene kuthathwa njengenxeba yefowuni xa ukungazami ukuzenza nokwamkela iifowuni kubangela ukuba ufumane iimpawu ezifana nokuxhalaba okukhulu, ukuphefumula okufutshane, okanye intliziyo yokugijima.

Sibanzi

Abo bangenayo inkxalabo yokuxhalaba kwintlalo banokuyika ukusebenzisa ifowuni; banokuba bakhululekile ekusebenzisaneni ngokuthe ngqo kwintlalo, mhlawumbi kuba ngenxa yokuba izicwangciso zobuso kunye nobuso zivumela ukuba bakwazi ukufunda izikhala ezingengomlomo, njengezibonakaliso zobuso . Nangona kunjalo, abo abaneengxaki zokuxhalaba kwezenhlalakahle bahluphekile. Ukuba ujongene nale meko, uloyiko lweefowuni lunokubonisa imibandela ojongene nayo malunga nokusebenzisana nabanye ngokubanzi.

Iimpawu

Ukuba uphendula ngokuthi "ewe" nakwezinye zezi zinto, ukwesaba kwefowuni yakho inokuba yinto efanelekileyo.

Ngaphambi nangemva kwefowuni ngaba:

• uzive ukhathazeke kakhulu?
• ukulibazisa ukwenza iifowuni ngenxa yokuxhalaba?
• ukukhathazeka ngokukhathaza omnye umntu?
• ukukhathazeka malunga nento oyakuyithetha?
• ukukhathazeka ngokuzihlazisa?
• ugweme ukwenza iifowuni okanye ukuba nabanye bakubizele?
• ucinga malunga noko kwathethwa emva kokubiza?

Xa usebenzisa kwifowuni:

• ku gubha?
• unenkxalabo yokugxila?

• uziva unesiqhelo?
• uvakalelwa intliziyo yakho?

Ukwesaba ukwenza nokwamkela iifowuni kunokuphazamisa ubomi bakho bobuqu kunye nobugcisa . Kubalulekile ukuthatha uxinzelelo lwefoni. Nangona ukuphendula ifowuni nokwenza iifowuni kunokubonakala ngathi ngumsebenzi olula wonke umntu onokukwazi ukukwenza, ukuba unokukhathazeka ngeefowuni zeefowuni, ukuxhalabisa kunokubangela ukwesabisa nokwenene.

Izinyango Zonyango

Utyando lweefowuni zefowuni lunokubandakanya ubuchule be -ctnitive-behavioral (CBT) , ezifana nokulungiswa kwengcamango kunye nokuqeqeshwa kwe-exposure . Ukongezelela, kukho ezininzi iindlela zokuzinceda ozizisebenzisayo ukujamelana nexhala malunga nokusebenzisa ifowuni.

Ukulungiswa kwengcamango kubandakanya iinkolelo ezinzima kwaye kufakela iingcamango ezingalunganga ngezinye iindlela ezakhayo. Umzekelo, ukuba uhlala uxhalabisa ukuba uya kuphazamisa omnye umntu xa ufowunela umnxeba, ukulungiswa kwengcamango kunokuba unokuqwalasela ubungqina bokuba oku kwenene.

Kutheni umntu aphendule ifowuni ukuba wayexakeke kakhulu? Kutheni ukuba ucele ukuba ubize ukuba akafuni ukuthetha nawe? Ekugqibeleni, ufikelele kwisigqibo sokuba akunakwenzeka ukuba uyamkhathaza omnye umntu okanye ukuba akafuni ukuthetha nawe.

Uqeqesho lokuboniswa komzimba lubandakanya ukuziphatha okuqhubekayo kokuziphatha okunzima kancinci. Kwimeko yenkxalabo yefowuni, ulawulo loloyiko lungajonga into efana neyansi apha (ibhalwe ukusuka elula kunzima kakhulu). Ukuziphatha ngalunye kuqhutyelwa de ube ukhululekile kwaye unako ukuqhubela phambili kunzima kunomnye onzima.

Ifowuni yoyika ulawulo oluphezulu

1. Shayela inombolo oyaziyo iya kuba nomyalezo orekhodiweyo, nje ngomgca wenkonzo yabathengi.

1. Shayela ilungu losapho okanye umhlobo owaziyo kakuhle.
2. Shayela ishishini kwaye ubuze umbuzo ocacileyo, njengokuba bavala.
3. Shayela umntu ongazi kakuhle ngombuzo olula.
4. Shayela umntu ongazi kakuhle malunga nomcimbi onzima.
5. Yenza nganye yeentlobo zangaphambili zeefowuni phambi komntu oyedwa.
6. Yenza nganye yeentlobo zangaphambili zeefowuni phambi kweqela labantu.

Uluhlu lwakho lolawulo luyahlukahluka kuxhomekeke ekubeni ufumana abahlobo okanye abantu abangaqhelekanga kunzima ukuthetha nabo, nokuba ngaba kunzima kuwe ukuthetha kwifowuni phambi komnye umntu.

Kungaba nzima ukwenza i-hierarchy ukujongana noloyiko lokuphendula iifowuni.

Ukuba ngokuqhelekileyo ugwema ukuphendula ifowuni, isicwangciso esinye siza kusebenzisa inombolo yesazisi yeefowuni ukuchonga obizayo. Unokuqala ngokuphendula iifowuni ezivela kubantu ukuba ukhululekile kunye nokuvumela ezinye iifowuni ziye kwiimeyile zezwi. Ekugqibeleni, uya kuphucula ukuphendula amakholi anzima.

Amacandelo okuCombulula

Ngokufanelekileyo, kufuneka usebenzise iindlela zobuchule-zokuziphatha phantsi kolawulo lomqeqeshi oqeqeshiwe. Ukuba ukudibana nomcebisi we-CBT akunakwenzeka, okanye ukuba sele sele uthathe inxaxheba kwi-CBT kwaye ufuna iindlela ezongezelelweyo zokuhlangabezana nazo, ezi zicwangciso zilandelayo zifikeleleke.

• Smile ngaphambi kokwenza nokufumana iifowuni. Oku kunokuba kungenangqondo, kodwa kukunceda uphumule kwaye uhambise umboniso wokonwaba kumntu othetha naye.
• Zizuze emva kokuba wenze iifowuni ezinzima ngokuchitha ixesha elithile ukwenza into onyolisayo.
• Yibone ngeso lengqondo ukwenza okanye ukufumana iifowuni ngempumelelo. Khawuxubushe ingxoxo entle kwaye uvakale emva koko.
• Ukuba ukhathazeke ngokuphazamisa umntu xa ufowuna, cela ukuba ngaba uyibamba umntu ngexesha elibi . Ukuba umntu uphakathi kwento ethile, oku kumnika ithuba lokuba anikezele ukukubiza.
• Ukuba umntu uthi "hayi" okanye uphendulela isicelo, qaphela ukuba ingaba zizathu ezininzi ezingenazo nantoni na. Zama ukungafundi ngokubanzi kwizenzo zomnye umntu .
• Yenza okulungelelaniswa ngaphambi kokwenza ucingo, kodwa ungahambi ngaphesheya kwee. Yazi ngokuqhelekileyo oko uya kuthetha, kodwa zama ukucinga ukuba ingxoxo ayinakuhamba njengoko uceba. Ukuba kukho iingongoma ezibalulekileyo ofuna ukuzinyusa, qiniseka ukubhala phantsi kwaye uzigcine zihamba kakuhle.
• Qaphela ukuba akusoloko uphendule ifowuni. Ukuba umntu ukubiza ngexesha elibi, okanye ukuba unxhala kakhulu ukuthetha, kuyamkeleka ukuvumela iifowuni ziye kwiimeyile zezwi ngezikhathi ezithile .
• Yazi ukuba ifowuni ayinakuba yindlela efanelekileyo kakhulu yokunxibelelana . Ukuba ufuna ukufumana irekhodi yengxoxo yakho okanye ukuba ufuna ukunika omnye umntu ixesha lokubonisa ngaphambi kokuphendula, i-imeyile inokuba yinto ekhethekileyo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba umbandela omele uxoxe ngawo uyinkimbinkimbi, uvakalelwa, okanye uquka ininzi ye-back-and-out, ukubiza okanye ukuhlangana ubuso nobuso kukuhle.

ILizwi

Ukukhathazeka kwefoni kunzima kodwa kunokukunqoba. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba ufumanisa ukuba ukwesaba kokwenza nokwamkela iifowuni kufinyelela kwezinye iindawo zobomi bakho, kwaye ukwesaba ukusebenzisana kwentlalo ngokubanzi, kunokukunceda ukubonisana neengcali zempilo yengqondo. Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba unengxaki yokuxhalaba kwentlalo, unyango olunjengeyeza okanye unyango lunokunikezelwa kuwe.

> Imithombo:

> McCabe RE, uSsinson R. Psychotherapy kwi-phobia ethile kubantu abadala.

> I-Romm C. Iingcali zengqondo zichazela iifowuni ukuxhalaba kunye nendlela yokufikelela kuyo.

> Verbeke W, uBagozzi RP. Ukuthengisa ukuxhalabisa uxanduva: Ukuhlola oko kuthetha ntoni xa ukwesaba kulawula ukuthengiswa kweentengiso. J Ukuthengisa 2000; 64: 88-101.