Iimiphumo ezintle ezinokuba nokuxhalabisa
Sivame ukuva malunga neemeko ezimbi zokuxhalaba, kodwa ngaba kukho nayiphi na inzuzo okanye inzuzo efumaneka ngokuhlala nexhala?
Ukuziva Ukuxhalabisa
Ukuxhalaba kukuba uvakalelwa kukuba uloyiko olukhulu, ukhathazeke, kwaye ukhathazeke. Abaninzi abanenkxalabo bayichaza njengento yokukhathazeka kunye nokwesaba oku kunokuphazamisa ngakumbi kunye nokugqithisa kakhulu.
Ukuxhalabisa kufumaneka kumava amaninzi, ukuphazamisa iimvakalelo zomntu, okukhokelela ekuveleleni okungathandekiyo, kunye negalelo kwiingcinga ezimbi.
Imiphumo emihle yokuxhalabisa
Lezi zimpawu zokuxhalaba yingxaki eqhelekileyo kubantu abaye bafumanisa ukuba banaluphi na uhlobo loxinzelelo lwexhala , kuquka ukuphazamiseka kwengxaki. Njengomntu ogula ngengxaki yokuphazamiseka, unokuyazi kakuhle indlela ukuxhalabisa kungakuphazamisa ngayo ubomi bakho. Nangona kunjalo, ngaba wakha wacinga ezinye zeempembelelo ezinokuthi zifike ngokuxhalaba?
Iingcali zenzululwazi ziye zafunda ukuba ezinye zeengxaki zokuxinezeleka okanye ukuxhalabisa akunjalo into embi. Uxinzelelo olungileyo, into ekubhekiswa ngayo ngoku njengesi- eustress , isenza sivuselelwe kwaye sinomdla ngobomi. Kubonakala ngathi ezinye iindidi zokuxhalaba zinokufana "nezilivere zesilivere." Masiqwalasele oko bakufundayo.
Ukuxhalabisa njengesibonakaliso soMkiso
Ukuxhalabisa kungabonakalisa isibonakaliso sokulumkisa ukuba uzisa ulwazi lwakho kwimeko yangoku kwaye wenze utshintsho olufunekayo ebomini bakho.
Ukukhathazeka ngokuphindaphindiweyo kunye nokwesaba kunokubonisa ukuba ezinye iinkalo zobomi bakho ziphelile kwaye zifuna ukulungiswa. Ngokomzekelo, unokufumanisa ukuba unalo ubudlelwane obungasasebenzi, mhlawumbi umsebenzi wakho ubangela uxinzelelo olukhulu , okanye mhlawumbi ulahlekelwa ukulala kwaye uzive uxhalabile.
Iimpawu zakho zinzima ukulawula, kodwa ukuhlolisisa nokuhlangabezana nokuxhalaba kwakho kunokufumana ithuba lokwenyuka. Ngexesha elizayo ukuxhalabisa, cinga ukuba yeyiphi isigidimi esinayo kuwe kunye nezilungiso olungenzeka ukuba uyenze ebomini bakho.
Ukuxhalabisa njengeNjongo
Kunokuba uhlale ucingwa njengesithintelo, ukuxhalabisa kunokukunceda ukuba uzive ungakumbi kwaye uzilungiselele xa ubhekene nemingeni. Uphando luye lwabonisa ukuba abafundi nabadlali abajongene nokuxhalabisa ngokwenene babonisa ukuphucula ukusebenza kwiimvavanyo okanye ngelixa bathatha inxaxheba kwimidlalo yokukhuphisana. Ngokufanayo, ukuxhalaba kwabanye abanememori efanelekileyo yokusebenza kunokunyusa ukwenziwa komsebenzi kwiimvavanyo zengqondo.
Cinga iindlela zokukhathazeka kwakho kudala ukukhuthaza ukuba uphumelele kwezinye iindawo zobomi bakho. Ngokomzekelo, mhlawumbi ukuxhalabisa kwakho kukunceda ngokubeka umgudu ongakumbi kwimisebenzi okanye kwimisebenzi yakho, ukwenza ingcamango efanelekileyo, okanye ukuhambela kwiinjongo zakho. Xa uqwalasela ukukhathazeka kwakho, zama ukucinga ngendlela ongayisebenzisa ngayo ukukhuthaza ukukhula kwakho nokuziphucula.
Ukuxhalabisa njengeNkqubo eyilungisayo
Nangona kubonakala kungenamsebenzi ngamanye amaxesha, kukho injongo yokuxhalabisa .
Ezi mvakalelo kunye neempawu ziyinxalenye yendlela yethu yokusingatha ingxaki. Eyaziwa ngokuba yimpendulo yokulwa-okanye-yindiza, uxhalabe lusetyenziswe ukusikhusela engozini kwaye sivumele ukuba sisabele ngokukhawuleza kwiimeko eziphuthumayo. Xa kufika okhokho bethu, impendulo yokumelana nokulwa-okanye-yendiza yabangela abantu ukuba bahlasele okanye babalekele ingozi ebomini kwimeko, njengezilwanyana eziyingozi okanye isimo sezulu. Ngezihlandlo zanamhlanje, uxhalaba lunokuba luphawu olusinceda ukuba uphendule ngokukhawuleza xa uphephe ingozi xa uqhuba imoto okanye ukhusela ukuba ungene kwindawo engaphephile okanye imeko. Olunye uphando oluthola e-UK
yafumanisa ukuba abantwana abaselula abanokukhathazeka babeneengozi ezimbalwa kunye nokufa ngokukhawuleza xa bekhulile kunabo babengenakho ukuxhalaba. Ngaloo ngqiqo, uxhalaba lunokuba ngumqondiso wokunceda uhlale ukhuselekile.
Uhlobo oluhle kuMhlobo
Abantu abajongene nokuxhalaba bangaba novelwano kunye nokuqonda kwimibandela abanye abajamelana nayo. Emva kokuba uhlangabezana nobunzima bakho, unokuba noxhala, unothando, kwaye uyamkela xa abahlobo namalungu entsapho bejongene nemingeni. Kuboniswe ukuba abantu abanenkxalabo baxhalabele kakhulu malunga nendlela abadibana ngayo nabanye. Ngaba uye waphawula ukuba ngamanye amaxesha kubonakala ngathi ungumhlobo nje umntu ofunayo?
Ukuxhalabisa njengeninzi kwiNkokheli
Abantu abanenkxalabo nabo banokuba nezakhono kwiinkokheli zobunkokeli, njengoko baqwalasela ngokucophelela ukuba kukho iziphumo ezininzi. Ngokomzekelo, abaninzi abanenkxalabo abanenkxalabo bayazi kakuhle izinto ezinokuthi zingahambi kakuhle, zibenza babe ngabacebisi abanononophelo, abenzi bezenzo ezinononophelo, kunye neengxaki zokusombulula iingxaki.
Okukwintsusa
Nangona kunokubakho iingeniso zokufumana uxhalabisayo, kwaye kuyafaneleka ukuzitshilola zona, kungathi kube yinto eyithintela ngokwenene kwimibandela yobomi bakho. Umsebenzi wakho, ubudlelwane kunye nezifiso zakho ziyakuchukumisa kakubi umzabalazo wakho wokuxhalabisa.
Ukuba ukuxhalabisa kukuthintela ekubeni uphile ubomi obunqwenelayo, ngoko kusenokuba ixesha lokuba ufumane uncedo lobuchwepheshe. Ugqirha okanye ugqirha uya kukwazi ukubona ukuba iimpawu zakho zihlangabezana neempembelelo zesifo sokuxhalabisa, njengengxaki yokuphazamiseka, ukuphazamiseka kwengxaki yokuxinzelela emva kokudandatheka (PTSD), okanye ingxaki yokukhathazeka kwentlalo (SAD). Ukongezelela, uya kuba nako ukuncedisa ekwakheni isicwangciso sonyango esinokukunceda ukuba uhlangabezane nokuxhalabisa kwakho.
Imithombo:
ULee, W., Wadsworth, M., noMnu Hotopf. Indima ekhuselekileyo yokuziphatha Ukuxhalabisa: Isifundo soLuntu lwexesha elide. Psychological MedicineM . 2006. 36 (3): 345-51.