Ulwaphulo olusisiseko sengqondo (REBT) luhlobo lonyango olujongene nokulwa neenkolelo ezingenangqondo kunye nokutshintsha iimpendulo zakho kwiimeko ezimbi ezenzekayo ebomini bakho.
Isiseko se-REBT isekelwe kwi-ABC Model:
- A = I-Event Activation (into eyenzekayo)
- B = Ukukholelwa (malunga nesiganeko)
- C = Isiphumo (ukusabela kwangokwemvakalelo kwinkolelo)
Ngokutsho kwe-REBT, ukusabela kwakho (C) kukubangelwa yinkolelo yakho (B) kwaye kungabangelwa ngqo kumcimbi (A).
Injongo ye-REBT kukuguqula inkolelo yakho (B) ukwenzela ukuba impendulo yakho (C) itshintshe. Oku kwenziwa ngenkqubo eyaziwa ngokuba yi-dispute, edla ngokugqitywa ngoncedo lomgqirha.
Ngokomzekelo, cinga ukuba unokwesaba ukwenza izethulo. Mhlawumbi awuqinisekanga nge-etiquette, xhalabisa ukuba uya kulibala igama lomntu, okanye uziva nje unxhala lokuba wenze izethulo okanye uzixelele kwabanye. Kwiimeko apho kuqaliswa khona izethulo, unokuphepha ukuthetha okanye ukulinda de kubekho abanye abantu abazichazayo.
Ngezantsi yintetho yesampula enokuthi ube nayo kunye neengcali zakho malunga noloyiko.
Umxhasi: Ndiziva ndiloyiko ukuzisa abantu, njengokuba ndingathi into engalunganga okanye ihlazo. Xa ndimele ndizenzele, ndivakalelwa kwaye ndivame ukuphela ndithethi nto. Abahambi mhlawumbi bacinga ukuba ndihlangene, kodwa ndivakalelwa kukuba ndinomdla wokwenza nantoni na.
Ugqirha: Ngoko uloyiko lokuba abanye abantu baya kucinga ukuba ungalunganga ekwenzeni izethulo. Yintoni embi ngaleyo nto?
Umxhasi: Andiqinisekanga ngokwenene, kodwa andinakubonakala ngathi ndingakwenza. Ndiziva ndikhululekile.
I-Therapist: Ngoko abanye abantu bagqiba ukucinga ukuba uyi-snob. Ngoko?
Umxhasi: Kulungile ukwenza abahlobo xa wenza impembelelo embi.
Iingcali: Eyona ingxaki ebalulekileyo yinkxalabo ozifaka yona ukuba wenze isingeniso. Kukwenza uxhalabise kakhulu malunga neemeko uze ungenzi nto.
Wena kunye nomphengululi wakho uza kuthi usebenze uluhlu lwamazwi athi "KUMELE". Zizo ezo nkolelo ezingenangqiqo ozixelela yona kwiimeko ezikhokelela kuwe ukuba uzive uzibi:
Ndimele ndihlangabezane nabanye okanye ndingenanto.
KUMELE ndibe noluntu olufanelekileyo okanye mhlawumbi andiyinto enhle.
Andifanelekanga ukwenza iimpazamo kwiimeko zentlalo okanye ndiyinto engafanelekanga.
Inkqubo enye yokusebenza kule "maxwebhu" kufuneka kubhale phantsi kumakhadi ekhompyutheni kunye neengxelo ezingenangqiqo ebhalwe phantsi kwekhadi ngalinye. Ngamazwi onke "kufuneka", wena kunye nomlopheli wakho unokuvela ezinezinkolelo ezine okanye ezintlanu zokutshintsha impilo.
Umzekelo:
I-FRONT OF FLASHCARD: "Ndimele ndihlangabezane nabanye."
KWENKQUBO YOKUPHILA:
- "Ndingathanda ukubukeka kakuhle ngexesha lonke, kodwa andinayo."
- "Akunzima xa ndiwenza iphutha lokuzisa abantu."
- "Nangona andizange ndizise, abantu abayi kundithiya."
- "Nangona ndilibale ukwenza izethulo, akusiyo isiphelo sehlabathi."
Umgqirha wakho uya kuba ujonge kula makhadi nanini na unemizuzu embalwa ngosuku lwakho ukwenza iindlela ezintsha zokucinga.
Ekugqibeleni, uya kufunda ukuba ayenzi izethulo ezenza ube nexhala, kodwa kunoko izidingo ozibekayo ukuba kufuneka zihambe kakuhle. Nangona ungazange uphumelele ekwenzeni izethulo, unokuba unxungubele kakhulu malunga namava onke.
Njengendlela yokwandisa iingcamango zakho ezingenangqondo nangaphezulu, cinga nje imeko enzima kakhulu: Wonke umntu owaziyo uqala ukukuphepha ngenxa yokuba ungalunganga ekwenzeni izethulo. Xa unokufika kwindawo ekubonayo ukwesaba kwakho, ungaqala ukuwayeka.
Ukongezelela ekusebenzeni ngeenkolelo zakho ezingenangqiqo, ungathatha amanyathelo okuphucula izakhono zakho zentlalo kwaye ufunde ngokuziphatha kwiindawo ezingakukhathazi.
Ngezantsi uluhlu lwezicwangciso ezithile zokuphucula izakhono zentlalo:
- Indlela yokwenza uQhagamshelwano lwemehlo
- Iingcebiso Zengxoxo
- Izingcingo zefoni
- Indlela Yokunikezela Ukuncoma
- Iintlanzi ezintathu zokuqala ingxoxo kunye nomntu ongekho
- Indlela Yokujoyina Ingxoxo
- Indlela Yokushiya Ingxoxo
- Indlela yokwenza iNgcaciso
- Indlela Yokuthetha Nabamelwane
Isishwankathelo, isiseko esisiseko se-REBT xa sisetyenziselwa ukuxhalaba kwentlalo kukusebenzela ukunqoba inkolelo engenangqondo yokuba wonke umntu makuthande kwaye avumele ukuba ube nexabiso.
Inkqubo ivame ukuqhutyelwa ngoluhlu lwemibuzo eyaziwa ngokuba yingxabano kunye nomqeqeshi oqeqeshiwe, nangona unokwenza ukutshintsha indawo inkolelo yakho. Kwintliziyo ye-REBT yicinga lokuba wenza imeko ebomini bakho ibe ngcono okanye ngokubi ngokuxhomekeke kwindlela ocinga ngayo.
> Imithombo:
> I-REBT Network. Yintoni i-REBT?
> Iingcali ezintathu zonyango. UKUHLAWULWA KWEMPILO.
> Iingcali ezintathu zonyango. Ukukhathazeka Kwezenhlalakahle: KuHug okanye Hayi.