Ukunceda Abathandekayo Baqonde Indlela Ukuziva Ukuyeka Ukubhema
Le "ileta" elandelayo kwintsapho kunye nabahlobo yabhalwa nguRichard, umyeni ongenamdla omnye welungu leforum ekunqanyeni ukutshaya.
Ngamava okuxhasa umfazi wakhe, uMary njengoko wayesebenza ukuyeka ukutshaya, uRichard wafunda okuninzi malunga noko kufana nomntu otshaya umva ophulukana nokutshaya kwe-nicotine.
Incwadi yakhe kumntu omthandayo ubonisa kakuhle indlela onokumxhasa ngayo ngakumbi uncedo lokutshaya ebomini bakho xa eyeka. Ileta yakhe ikwabhekisa nendlela onokuzigcina ngayo umlinganiselo wakho xa izinto zingenakuzihlaziya.
Ndiyabulela ukwabelana, uRichard.
Dear______,
Ndiza kuzama ukutshintsha ubomi bam ukuze kube ngcono. Ndiya kuyeka ukutshaya. Ndandifuna ukubhalela le ncwadi kuwe ukuze ukwazi ukuba ungayilindela inyanga ezayo okanye kunjalo, kuba inkqubo yokuhoxiswa kwe-nicotine inokuba nzima kum, nakwabandungileyo. (Uninzi lwabantu aluyikuqonda, kodwa ukukhwabanisa kwe-nicotine ngenye yezilwanyana ezinzima kakhulu ukukhaba, kunzima kunokuba i-heroin, ngenxa yeendlela ezithintekayo ngayo ubomi bethu).
Wonke umntu uyasabela kwiimpawu zokurhoxisa ngokuhlukileyo, kodwa ngokubanzi, ngeeveki zokuqala ezimbini (iVeki yeSihogo kunye neveki yeHeck), ungalindelanga kakhulu kum. Andiyi kuba ngumntu oqhelekileyo. Yonke ingqalelo yam iya kuthathwa ngokulwa nokukhuseleka ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo ukutshaya. Ndiya kulila, ndiyothusa, ndiyakunyanisa. Okubaluleke kunene konke, ndinokuthetha izinto ezibuhlungu kuwe, kodwa ndifuna ukuba wazi ukuba oku kuthetha inicotine, kungekhona intliziyo yam.
Ndiya kuxolisa emva koko, emva kokuba utyhefu ushiye umzimba wam kwaye ingqondo yam isicacile, kodwa mzuzwana, nceda, KUNCEDA ukhumbule ukuba ndiyakuthanda, kwaye uvumele ukuba iqhube umva wakho.
Udinga ukwazi ukuba xa umntu otshayayo ephuma, umzimba kunye nengqondo iya kuzama phantse nantoni na ukukhohlisa umsebenzisi ukuba athathe enye inkunzi.
Ndiza kuqikelela ukuba "ngoku ayikho ixesha elihle". Ndingazibuza ukuba kufuneka ndibe khona. Ndiyakwazi ukuthetha ngokuvakalelwa kwintsipho kunye nokulahleka. Umzimba wam unokuhlakulela iintlungu kunye neentlungu. Andikwazi ukulala. Ndiya kwenza njengentlungu endikufumana ngayo yonke into ephosakeleyo.
Nceda uqaphele ukuba ndikwenza oku kum, kungekhona kuwe. Kule ndlela enye ebalulekileyo, kufuneka ndizingca, ukuze ndikwazi ukunikela i-nicotine isizathu sokugxeka omnye umntu. Ngoko akufanele uzive unoxanduva lokukhathazeka kwam nokuxinezeleka. Nangona uvakalelwa kukuba awukwazi ukuma ukundibona ngale ndlela, nantoni na enokwenzayo, UNGAZIxelele ukuba kulungile ukutshaya, ukuyeka nje intlungu. Kumele ube namandla xa ndibuthathaka, ngoko awuvumelani nanoma yiyiphi "i-junkie ingcinga" Ndingayifumana.
Nazi izinto ezili-10 onokuzenza ukuze uncede:
- Yiba khona xa ndifuna i-hug, kodwa musa ukubuhlungu xa ndikukhupha.
- Ukuba ndikuxelela ukuba undishiye ndedwa, ndinike indawo, kodwa ungayi kude kakhulu ... Ndifuna ukwazi ukuba usondele kungakhathaliseki ukuba i-nicotine ithi.
- Ungazami ukuxabana nam xa ndiqala ukuhlalutya ... ukuthula ngumyalezo onamandla ngakumbi.
- Gwema isihloko sesi-cigarettes (kuba ndizama ukubakhupha ingqondo yam), ngaphandle kokuba ndiyifake kuqala.
- Yenza okusemandleni akho ukuba wenze njengokungathi yonke into iyinto eqhelekileyo. Eyona "evamile" oyenzayo, ngokukhawuleza ndiya kufika khona.
- Qaphela ukuba ungangifaki kwiimeko apho ndiza kubakho kubabhemi. Oku kunokuthetha ukuphepha ukutya okuthandayo okanye imivalo, okanye ukuxhoma kunye nabahlobo abathile ngokukhawuleza.
- Qaphela ukuba ndivumele ukungena kwiimeko ezixinzelelekileyo ... ukuba into enxinxisayo ingasuswa kwiiveki ezimbalwa, nceda uzame ukwenza njalo. Ukuba akunjalo, nceda uzame ukundinceda.
- Ndincede ndiphephe "iimeko" zokuhlala ... indawo okanye imisebenzi apho ndiqhele ukukhanya khona. (Ngokomzekelo, ungacwangcisi uhambo olude lweeveki ezimbalwa ezilandelayo ukuba ndiqhele ukutshaya emotweni).
- Qhubeka u ndi xelele ukuba kuya kuba ngcono, ukuba ukungabi nalutho kunye nentlungu kuya kupheka, ukuba uyandithanda, kwaye ukuba le mzamo ifanelekile.
- Ndixelele ndiyomelele. Ndixelele ukuba uyaziqhenya ngam. Kodwa ke, xelela ukuba uya kuba khona kungakhathaliseki ukuba ndithetha ntoni okanye ndenze ntoni.
Ndandifuna ukukulungiselela kuba iiveki ezimbalwa zokuqala zihlala zibi kakhulu, kodwa qaphela ukuba ayiphuculanga ngokukhawuleza ... iya kuba yinkqubo encinane.
Kwakhona, nceda uqaphele ukuba ngelixa ndikwenza oko, ndiyeke mna, wena nabo bajikelezile baya kunceda. Ndiza kukhululeka kwiintonga zokufuna ukwazi apho ivenkile yegagrethe esondele. Ndiya kukhululeka kumnandi kunye namacwecwe. Ndiza kukhululeka ekufeni kwangaphambili. Kwaye ndiya kukhululeka ukuba ndichithe ixesha elifanelekileyo kunye nabo ndibathandayo.
Ndiyabulela kwangaphambili ukuba unamandla ngokwaneleyo ukuba undithande, kwaye uncede kum.
Uthando, _______