Ingqwalasela yesifo esixhalabisayo (GAD) ixhala kunye nokuxhalabisa okungafani nendawo ethile. Ngokuqhelekileyo, uxhalaba luyaqhubeka kwaye lunokuthi lube neemeko eziqhelekileyo. Uninzi lwexhala lujoliswe kwimiphumo emibi yeso siganeko okanye imeko. Ngokomzekelo, umntu unokukhathazeka ngeeyure ezenza iphutha elincinci emsebenzini liza kubangela ukuxothwa okanye ukuba ukungathandabuzeki kwentlalo kubangelwa ukulahlekelwa ngumhlobo.
Abanye abantu banokuzijonga ezi ngcamango njengengcikivo okanye ezingenangqiqo, kodwa kumntu ono-GAD, ukuxhalaba malunga neziphumo ezinokwenzeka ngokwenene.
Ungathini ukuba?
Kukho iindlela ezininzi zokuhamba malunga nomngeni wale ngcamango kwaye enye indlela eqhelekileyo ibizwa ngokuba yi-"decatastrophizing." Le ndlela iyingxenye yonyango yolwazi kwaye yenzelwe ukuba umntu ahlangabezane nesimo esibi esinoyikayo. Okubaluleke kakhulu, ukuhlaselwa kwesidingo kufuna umntu ukuba abuze "kuthini ukuba" izinto ezimbi zenzeke ngokwenene. Wayeza kuthini xa ephendula? Injongo yokujongana nokuxhalabisa endaweni yokujongana nokukhathazeka ngokwayo, kodwa isiphumo. Ngokugxininisa kumanyathelo alandelayo emva kwesimo esona sibi kakhulu, unokucinga ngesicwangciso kwaye usenokufika ekuqinisekiseni ukuba kwakungeke kube njengokutshatyalaliswa komhlaba njengoko ucinga.
Kule mizekelo ingentla, unokubuza ukuba "kuthini ukuba ndixothwe, ndingathini na?" Impendulo ngokuqhelekileyo: Nangona ingaba nzima kumaxesha, ndiza kufumana umsebenzi omtsha.
Ngomnye umzekelo, unokwenza isigqibo sokuba "Kuya kuba buhlungu kunye neentloni, kodwa ndiza kuba ngaphaya koko ndifumane umhlobo omtsha." Nangona ezi ziphumo ezibi, azipheli ubomi okanye ziphazamise ngokupheleleyo. Kunokwenzeka ukuba uqhubeke.
Yizame!
Ukuziqhelanisa, ukwahlula iphepha kwiifolumu ezintathu.
Ngowokuqala, bhala isiphumo esicatshisayo. Ngesibili, bhala njengesivakalisi esithi "ukuthini ukuba". Kwikholam ye sibini bhala oko uza kwenza. Hlola kunye nawe ukuze ubone ukuba ngaba ukwenene nokujongana noloyiko nokwenza isicwangciso sinciphisa uxhalaba oludibene nalo. Ukuba kukhokelela kwenye inkohlakalo enjengentloni, yenze ukuba ukwesaba okulandelayo kwikholamu yokuqala kwaye uqhubeke. Khangela ukuba unokufikelela kwindawo yokuzola nokukhuseleko.
Umlingo kule nkqubo kukuba uvumela ukuba senze izicwangciso zeemeko eziloyiko, ezenza siphethe ngakumbi kwaye zinciphise ukukhathazeka kwethu ngabo. Kususa imfihlelo kwaye ivumela ukuba siqiniseke ukuba kungakhathaliseki ukuba kwenzekani, siya kuba sekulungile kwaye sinokukunqoba malunga naziphi na iimeko.
Le yindlela enye enokuyifumana incedo ekujonganeni nokuxhalaba kwakho. Ukuba, nangona kunjalo, ukuxhalaba kwakho kunzima kangangokuthi kukuphazamisa ubomi bakho bemihla ngemihla, njengokungcolisa uhambo okanye ubudlelwane bakho , ngoko lixesha lokuqwalasela ukubona umgulana . Zama ukufumana umboneleli wezempilo ojongene neengxaki zokuxhalabisa onokukunceda nge-GAD kwaye unokukunceda ukuba ubuyele kumzila.
Umthombo:
I-Boyles, A. "Kuyintoni ukuxhatshazwa?" I-Psychology namhlanje , ngo-2013.