Abantu abajongene nokukhathazeka kweentlalo (SAD) bahlala bebandakanya "ukuziphatha okukhuselekileyo." Zizo ezo zinto ozenzayo ukuzama ukuphepha ukuhlazeka phambi kwabanye. Nangona kubonakala ngathi ukwenza ezi zinto kunceda ukunciphisa uxhalaba lwakho, ekuhambeni kwexesha, oko ukwenzayo kukugcina ukwesaba kwakho. Ukuba ucinga ukuba unokwazi ukuhlala usinikela intetho xa ungalokothi ubheke phezulu kubaphulaphuli, ngoko uya ku soyika u kuthetha koluntu .
Kubantu abane-SAD, ukuziphatha okukhuselekileyo kunceda injongo yokulawula okanye ukunciphisa amava akho kunye nokulawula iimvakalelo. Ukuba awuqinisekanga ukuba uyazibandakanya naziphi na iintlobo zokuziphatha, cinga ngendlela oziphatha ngayo xa uhlala kwimeko yentlalo okanye yentsebenzo. Ngaba wenza izinto ngokungafaniyo xa uhlala wedwa?
Mhlawumbi xa uthetha nabanye uthetha ngokukhawuleza okanye ubeke isandla sakho ngomlomo wakho. Unokuphinda uhlaziye oko utsho ngokuthetha ukwesaba oko kuphuma ngendlela engafanelekanga. Ungaphinde ugweme ukuqhagamshelana kwamehlo kwaye ugcine izandla zakho zingabonakali ukuze abanye bangakuboni ukugubha . Zonke ezi ziphatha zenzelwe ukuzama nokugubha uxhalaba lwakho.
Ngaba uyazifumana ungahambanga iingxoxo ezungeze kuwe? Ukuba kunjalo, unokuba uzikhusele kwingxoxo njengendlela yokuhlala ukhuselekile. Ukuhambela phambili yindlela yokuhlala "ngaphakathi kwentloko yakho" kwaye ingabandakanyekanga nakwizinto ezenzeka malunga nawe.
Nangona unokuba uzive ungaxhalabelekanga, ukuba unqamle uhambo kwaye uqale ukubandakanya, uxhalaba luya kubuya. Le mpawu isisombululo se-band-aid kwisingxaki esiphezulu.
Ukuziphatha okukhuselekileyo nako kunokulimaza ngokwabo. Abanye abantu abaneengxaki zokuxhalabisa abantu bangasebenzisa utywala okanye iziyobisi njengendlela yokujongana neemeko zentlalo.
Emva kwexesha, ukusetyenziswa kakubi kotywala kunokuguqula utywala . Ezi ntlobo zokuziphatha zokhuseleko azigcini nje kwaye zihlale zixhalabisa kodwa zingakhokelela kwimiphumo emibi.
Ukhuselo lwezokhuseleko kunye nokuPhepha
Ukuziphatha okukhuselekileyo kunokubakhohlisa ngakumbi kunezo zidweliswe ngasentla. Mhlawumbi uqulethe isignesha elula ukuze abantu bangaboni ukuxhaphaza izandla xa ubhalisa phambi kwabo. Unokuphepha ukuzama izinto ezintsha ngenxa yokwesaba ukuhlazeka xa wenza iimpazamo okanye ungazikwazi ukwenza izinto phambi kwabanye abantu. Abanye abantu abane-SAD baqaphele xa bephuma emakhaya abo ukuze bangabikho kumelwane kwaye kufuneka benze intetho.
Ingxaki ngokuziphatha kokukhusela kukuba bahlala bexhalaba. Ukholelwa ukuba isizathu esisodwa sokusinda kwimiba yimiqathango oyithathayo ukulawula uxhalaba lwakho. Isihluthulelo sokufumana ulawulo lwangempela kukuzibonakalisa kwiimeko ngaphandle kokusebenzisa ukuziphatha kwakho ukhuseleko kwaye ugcine umphumo. Emva kwexesha, uya kubona ukuba unokufumana ngaphandle kokuziphatha kwezi ndlela ezithile. Olu hlobo lokubhenca luqhutywa kakuhle njengenxalenye yenkqubo yonyango yonyango kunye nomgqirha.
Imithombo:
Antony, MM, Stein, MB. I-Oxford incwadi yokuxhalabisa kunye neengxaki ezihambelanayo. ENew York: i-Oxford University Press; 2008.
Hoffman, SG, Otto, MW. Ukunyangwa kwengqondo yokuziphatha kwengxaki yokuxhalabisa abantu. I-Boca Raton, FL: I-CRC Press; 2008.
Markway, BG, Markway, GP. Ndibuhlungu Ngamahloni. ENew York: I-Press yaseSt. Martin; 2003.