Ngaba unokutshata nomntu oqhawule naye?
Akunqabile ukuba uva umntu esithi bafuna ukutshata kwakhona nomyeni wakhe okanye umfazi. Ndiyicinga ukuba ingca yayingenayo i-greener okanye ixesha eliphilise isilonda! Kungakhathaliseki isizathu, kwenzeka ngezinye izihlandlo. Ukuba ungumntu ovuselela ukutshata nomntu osekude naye, kukho izinto ezibalulekileyo zokuqwalasela.
Kutheni umntu efuna ukwenza oku kuqala?
Nazi ezinye zezizathu ezinokwenzeka:
- Ubomi obungabodwa bungaqinisekanga kwaye bunzima
- Uyazi ukuba wenza iphutha elikhulu
- Uqhawule umtshato ngenxa yezizathu zobulumko okanye ngokukhawuleza
- Awusoze waphuma ngenxa yothando
- Unokukhula okwenu okukukhokelela kulobu budlelwane
- Ukwazi
- Uxolele kwaye / okanye ukhohliwe izinto owenziwe ngumlingani wakho
- Intsapho yakho isayithanda kwaye ilwalamano lwakho
Ukuba wena kunye nomntu ode naye ucinga ukubuyela kunye nceda wazi ezi zinto zintathu:
- Iingxaki zichasene nawe.
- Kufuneka uthathe izinto ngokukhawuleza.
- Ufanele ubone umcebisi womtshato kwaye uthathe izifundo zemfundo yomtshato.
Izibalo ezichasene nokuKwazisa
Izibalo zichasene nezibini ezitshatileyo. Imitshato emibini yesibini iphelile ngokuqhawula umtshato kunemitshato yokuqala.
I-Psychology Today ithi "... i-60% yemitshato iyaphumeleli kwaye yenza njalo ngokukhawuleza; emva kweminyaka eyi-10, ama-37% omtshato aphelile ngokumalunga no-30% yemitshato yokuqala."
Uncedo Lokwenza Ixesha Lesibili Lonke Lihlangane Ngempumelelo
Ukuba ucinga ngokutshata kwakhona nomlingane wakho wangaphambili, nali iziphakamiso zokuphucula amathuba akho okuba nomtshato wesibini ophumelelayo omnye komnye:
- Ukubuyela ndawonye ndawonye ngenxa yezingane yinto engalunganga. Buyela kunye ngenxa yokuba uyayithanda (kwaye uyathanda) kunye kwaye ufuna ukuphinde uhlangane.
- Ukuba unabantwana, ungabavumeli ukuba bobabini nithandana kwakhona ixesha elithile. Bangakwazi ukufumana ithemba lokuba bobabini benu baya kuxolelana kwaye oku kungakufaka ingcinezelo ngakumbi ukuba wenze njalo nangona izinto zingekho phakathi kobabini kuwe njengokuba ungathanda.
- Jonga umcebisi womtshato. Kufuneka ufunde kwimbali yakho yomtshato okanye bobabini benu baya kulahlwa ukuyiphinda. Ibhizinisi elingaphendulwanga kwaye elingagqibekanga liya kuvelisa okwesibini ngeenxa zonke.
- Ukujonga ngokunyanisekileyo oko kubangela ukuba uqhawule umtshato. Ukuba kwakuyinkinga ngemali, cacisa ukuba uza kuchitha njani imali. Ukuba ngaba malunga nemiba yomzali, sebenzisa le mpikiswano kuqala. Ukuba kwakungenxa yokungathembeki, qiniseka ukucwangcisa oku, ukuxolela, nokwakha ithemba.
- Yivume kwindima yakho kunye noxanduva lwakho kwizinto ezingahambi kakuhle kumtshato wakho wokuqala omnye komnye. Ukuba awukwazi ukwenza oku ngokukhawuleza, uya kuqhubeka ulwa nomlo okanye umtshato.
- Thatha i-workshop yomtshato okanye ikhosi ndawonye.
- Gcina izinto ngokunyanisekileyo phakathi kwakho bobabini. Akukho mdlalo odlala. Akukho mvavanyo yokufunda engqondweni. Akukho zilindelo ezingabonakaliyo. Yabelana ngomnye nomnye, ulindele, namaphupha.
- Kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuba umtshato wokuqala uswelekile. Njengoko kunzima nje oku, musa ukuvumela loo nto iphosakele umtshato wakho omtsha.
- Ungesabi ukujamelana nemibandela edlulileyo eyabangela ukungquzulana phakathi kwenu bobabini.
- Musa ukuhlala ucinga ngeempazamo zakho. Gxininisa kwikamva lakho kunye.
- Khawucinge ngesivumelwano esilandelayo
- Yiba nethemba elifanelekileyo. Ngundoqo, uza kutshata nomntu ofanayo.
- Ukuphinda kwakhiwe isiseko esitsha kuthatha ixesha kunye nemigudu.
- Yiba ngqiqo. Ukuba ufunda ngokuthandana kunye nokucebisa ukuba izinto azilungile, zithemba umthambo wakho.
- Hlalani nihle kwaye ninethemba.
Ukuphuhlisa ukuthembela nokwenza umsebenzi womtshato emva kokuqhawula umtshato kudinga ukuzimisela ngokuqinileyo kulwalamano kunye nonke. Kwakhona, musa ukukhawuleza umtshato wesibini kunye nomlingane wakho wokuqala.
Thatha ixesha lokuqonda ubudlelwane bakho kunye nomnye ngokugcwele.
* I-Article ihlaziywe nguMarni Feuerman