Ukuphuhlisa indlela yokuziThetha yokuThetha!
Awukwazi ukuyiqonda, kodwa ukuthetha kwakho kungabangela ingxaki yakho! Ukuzithetha-indlela indlela ilizwi lakho elingaphakathi liqondakala ngayo ihlabathi elikujikelezile kunye nendlela othetha ngayo nomntu wakho wangaphakathi-kunokuchaphazela kakhulu amanqanaba okuxinwa kwiindlela ezininzi. Ukuba ukuzithetha kwakho ngokuqhelekileyo kukubi, unokubona iimbandeko ukuba ubomi bakho bunzima ngakumbi kunokuba budinga ukuba bube nokudala uxinzelelo olungenasidingo kunye noxinzelelo lwakho.
Unokuthi ube negalelo elibi kubantu abanentsingiselo efanelekileyo, unokuzibona ungenakuxhotyiswa ubuncinane ukujongana nemingeni ojongene nayo, kwaye unokuba ubona izinto ezingekho phantsi kwezinto ezintle kwizinto ojongene nazo ebomini, xa kunokuba Uxinzelelo oluncinci "oluqaqambileyo" ongenalo ukuqonda ngenxa yokuziphatha okungekho nto. Ungakhokelela ekuhlaleni , umzekelo wokucinga okungekho nto onokuyidla ixesha lakho elingenalutho kwaye ubeke uxinzelelo kwixesha elidlulileyo ukuya kwangoku kungabikho ngokungabikho ngaphandle kokukhokelela nasiphi na isisombululo.
Iipatheni zezinto ezimbi okanye ezizithethayo zihlala ziqala ebuntwaneni. Ngokuqhelekileyo, umkhwa we-self-talk ungumbala wokucinga kwethu iminyaka kwaye unokusichaphazela ngeendlela ezininzi , ukuphazamisa amava oxinzelelo kwimpilo yethu. Nangona kunjalo, nayiphi na ixesha lixesha elifanelekileyo lokutshintsha! Nazi ezinye iindlela onokuzenza uzibambe ekusebenziseni ukuthetha okungekho nto kwaye usebenzise ingqondo yakho ukukhulisa imveliso yakho kunye nokuzithemba kunye nokunciphisa uxinzelelo.
Phawula Iimpawu Zakho
Isinyathelo sokuqala ekutshintshiseni kukuqonda ngakumbi ingxaki. Mhlawumbi awuqapheli ukuba kaninzi kangakanani ukuthetha izinto ezintle entloko yakho, okanye ukuba kuthinta kangakanani amava akho. Ezi zicwangciso ezilandelayo zinokukunceda uqaphele ngakumbi ingxoxo yakho yangaphakathi kunye nomxholo wayo.
- Umbhalo Ukubhala : Ingaba uhamba nephepha elikufutshane nawe kwaye ubeka phantsi iingcamango ezingathandekiyo xa uzicinga, bhala isishwankathelo esipheleleyo seengcamango zakho ekupheleni kosuku, okanye qalisa ukubhala ngeemvakalelo zakho kwisihloko esithile uze ubuye emva koko ukuyihlalutya ngomxholo, ukupapashwa kungaba yinto efanelekileyo yokuhlola inkqubo yakho yangaphakathi.
- Ukumisa ukucinga : Njengoko uzibona utsho into engafanelekanga engqondweni yakho, unokuyeka ukucinga kwakho phakathi kwam ukusasaza kwam esithi "Yeka". Ukuthetha oku kukuvakala kunamandla, kwaye ukuthetha ngokuvakalayo kuya kukukunceda uqonde ukuba kaninzi kangakanani ukuyeka iingcamango ezimbi, kwaye phi.
- I-Rubber-Band Snap : Enye inkohliso yokunyanga kukuhamba ngebhola ye-rubber ngasesandleni sakho; Njengoko ubona ukuzithetha okungekho nto, bhenxisa ibhande kude kwesikhumba uze uyivumele. Kuya kuba buhlungu kancinci, kwaye ube ngumphumo ongathandekanga ozokwenza ukuba uqaphele ngakumbi iingcamango zakho kwaye uncede uwamise! (Okanye, ukuba awufuni ukuzithobela ukuhamba ngebhola yerabha esikhwameni sakho, uya kuba noqaphele ngakumbi ukunciphisa iingcamango ezimbi!)
Faka iNgcaciso yeNkcazo
Indlela efanelekileyo yokumisa umkhwa omubi kukubuyisela into engcono.
Emva kokuba uqaphele ingxoxo yakho yangaphakathi, nantsi ezinye iindlela zokuziguqula:
- Imbono yeMilder: Ngaba uke wafika esibhedlele waza wabona ukuba ngabahlengikazi bathetha 'ngentlungu' kunokuba 'buhlungu'? Oku kuqhutyelwa ngokuba 'intlungu' lizwi elinamandla kakhulu, kwaye ukuxoxa ngezinga 'leentlungu' kunokwenza ukuba amava akho akomelele ngakumbi kunokuba uxoxa ngezinga lakho 'elincinci'. Unokuzama le qhinga kwimpilo yakho yemihla ngemihla. Kwi-self-intetho, ukuguqula amagama angamandla amaninzi kumaqela angathathi hlangothi kunokunceda ukuncedisa amava akho. Esikhundleni sokusebenzisa amagama anjengokuthi 'ukuzonda' kunye 'nentukuthelo' (njengokuthi, " Ndiyayinqabela imoto!"), Ungasebenzisa amagama anjengokuthi 'andithandi' kwaye 'uyacaphukisa' ("Andiyi ' Ndingathanda i-traffic; inenza ndicaphuke, "izandi zibuhlungu, akunjalo?)
- Sitshintsha ukungalungi ukuba ungathathi hlangothi okanye ulungile : Njengoko ufumana ukukhalaza ngengqondo malunga nento ethile, cinga ngokucinga kwakho. Ngaba ucinga into into engebiyo xa kungenjalo, akunjalo? (Ngokomzekelo, ukuba izicwangciso zakho zikhanseliwe ngomzuzu wokugqibela zingabonwa njengento engalunganga, kodwa oko uyenzayo kwishedyuli yakho esanda kukhululeka kunokukwenza oko ukwenza ngako.) Ngexesha elizayo ufumana uxinzelelo malunga nento okanye ukhethe ungayi kulucelomngeni, uyeke uphinde ucinge kwakhona, ubone ukuba unokuthi ungene endaweni engathathi hlangothi okanye efanelekileyo.
- Ukutshintshwa kweeNgxelo zokuzikhawulela kwiMibandela : Izitatimende zokuzikhawulela ezinjengokuthi "andinakukwazi ukuphatha oku!" Okanye "Oku akunakwenzeka!" Ziyonakalisa ngokukhethekileyo ngenxa yokuba zandisa uxinzelelo lwakho kwimeko ethile kwaye zikumisa ekufuneni izicombululo. Ngexesha elizayo xa ufumanisa ukuba ucinga into ethile ephazamisa amathuba okufumana imeko, yibuyisele ibe ngumbuzo. Ngaba "ndingayisingatha njani le nto?" Okanye " njani le nto inokwenzeka?" Isandi sithemba ngakumbi kwaye uvula ingcamango yakho kumathuba amatsha?
Unokukunceda ngokwakho ukuhlakulela ngokwakho intetho ngokuziphathisa amandla angakumbi ebomini bakho. Nazi ezinye izixhobo zokuzungezela nge-positivity ngoko ingqondo yakho isoloko ithembele kwaye ifanelekile.