Ukuphazamiseka okuPhephayo kunokuchaphazela ukuphazamiseka kobuNtu
Abantu abanesifo sokuphazamiseka badla ngokucinga ngeengcinga ezingathandekiyo . Oku kubaluleke kakhulu ngexesha lokuhlaselwa kweentlanzi xa ilizwi lakho langaphakathi lingakwandisa ukwesaba nokukhathazeka. Ngokomzekelo, xa ukwesaba kukubamba, unokukholelwa ukuba ngokwenene uyayeka ukuphefumula okanye ukuba uhamba ngobuqhetseba.
Uluhlu olungezantsi luyicinga elingaqhelekanga phakathi kwabantu abaneengxaki zokuxhalabisa .
Ukuze utshintshe ukucinga kwakho, kufuneka uqale uqaphele le meko yeengcamango eziyingxenye engundoqo yentswelo yakho.
Ukubikezela
Xa uqikelele, uqikelele isiganeko esizayo. Abantu abanesifo sokuphazamiseka esichengileyo sokuthi kuya kwenzeka ntoni. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba uloyiko lwendiza, ngelixa uhamba ngeenqwelo-moya ungacinga ukuba, "Le ntshukumo iyangalisa, ndiyazi into ephosakeleyo ngendiza." Okanye ukuba unesi-agoraphobia kwaye ukwesaba ukushiya ikhaya lakho, Cinga ukuba "Ukuba ndihamba, ndiyazi nje ukuba ndiza kuhlaselwa yintlanzi."
Ingxaki ngokubikezela kukuba yondla kuphela ukuxhalabisa, okwenza ube neloyiko ngakumbi. Njengoko iimvakalelo ziba nzima, ingcamango yakho iyahamba kuphela ekuhambeni kokulawula. Umbono wakho unokwanda kwiintsholongwane ezifana "Ndiyazi nje ukuba le ndege iya kuphazamiseka" okanye "Ukuba ndihlaselwa yintlanzi ebantwini, ndiza kuhlamba kwaye kufuneka ndizinikezele."
Ukuzibulala
Abantu abaxhalabileyo kunye neentlonelo badla ukusebenzisa amagama "fanele", "kufanele" okanye "kufuneka" xa bechaza ngokwabo kunye nemeko yabo. Unokholo olunjengaloo nto, "Ndimele ndizincwane kwiinqwelo," "Ndimele ndikhululeke kuluntu " okanye "Ndimele ndibe ngumntu ongaphumeleli." Ezi zigwebo ezinzima ziyanceda ekunciphiseni ukuxhalabisa.
Endaweni yoko, uyaxhalabisa iingcamango zokuzibulala. Unokuqala ukuzigxeka ngokuba nesifo sokuphazamiseka, ukukholelwa ukuba yinto ephosakeleyo kwinqanaba lakho. Ungaphinda usebenzise igama lokubiza igama, njengokuzixelela ukuba "unomsindo" okanye "unobuthakathaka." Oku kunokukhokelela ekugqibeleni kwiindawo ocinga ngazo ukuba "awusoze uzive ulungile kuluntu" okanye "uya kuhlala uziva . "Zonke ezi ngcamango eziwonakalisayo zongeza kwintlungu yokungenakunceda, okwenza ingxaki yokuphazamiseka ibe nzima kakhulu.
Ukufunda ingqondo
Ukwethuka kuvame ukuphakanyiswa xa sikholelwa ukuba sigwetywa ngabanye. Abantu abanesifo sokuphazamiseka babedla ukuba abanye bawavumi, ukuvakalelwa ngakumbi kunye nexhala. Nangona kungekho ubungqina bokuba abanye bakuhlolisisa ngokucacileyo, usenokholo lokuba abanye banokuphazamiseka kuwe. Unokuba ngumntu onomdla, ofuna ukuthandwa nokubonwa uphelele ngabanye. Unokuziva uziphantsi kwabanye, ucinga ukuba awukwazi ukulinganisa.
Xa ufunda ingqondo, unengcamango enjengokuthi "Ndiyakwazi ukusichazela ngobuso bomlindi wendiza ukuba kukho ingxaki enkulu endizeni" okanye xa uphandle kuluntu ucinga, "Loo mntu unokuxelela ukuba ndinentshutshiso.
Ucinga ukuba ndi-neurotic. Njengoko uyakubona, ezi ngxelo zingaphakathi zenza ukuba uthuthuke.
Ezi nkqubo zengcamango eziwonakalisayo zigalela kumava akho ngeengxaki zokuphazamiseka. Ngaba uyayiqonda indlela yakho yokucinga kwiinkqubo zeenkolelo? Ukuze utshintshe indlela ocinga ngayo, kufuneka uqaphele okokuqala iingcamango zakho. Ukuqala ukutshintsha, gcina incwadi kunye neepeni kunye nawe . Kulo lonke suku zama ukuhlawula yonke into engoziyo uyayibona. Ekupheleni kosuku, usenokumangaliswa ngamaxesha amaninzi onengcamango engafanelekanga efana nezo zidweliswe apha.
Kaloku ukuba unayo iphepha, sebenzisa ixesha lokubhala isitatimenti esakhayo ngakumbi.
Ngokomzekelo, masithi ubhala ingcamango engafanelekiyo, njengokuthi "ndimele ndibe ngaphantsi kwenkxwaleko kwaye nifake." Zama ukuthatha indawo leyo ngcamango enjengokuthi, "Ezinye iintsuku zibhetele kunezinye, kodwa ndiyazi ukuba ukwenza konke okusemandleni akho ukunqoba ukuxhalaba nokukhathazeka. "Nangona uphandle esidlangalaleni ungacinga," Ndiyazi ukuba uyandibheka kwaye ndicinga ukuba ndiyincence. "Faka endaweni leyo ngokuthi," Wandijonga nje ngokuba ndangena kwivenkile. Ndiqinisekile ukuba wayecinga ngobomi bakhe. "Xa uqonda ngakumbi inkqubo yakho yokucinga, kuya kuba lula ukuguqula. Ngokuhamba kwexesha, izimvo zakho malunga nawe kunye nehlabathi elikujikelezayo ziza kutshintsha zibe yinto enomdla ngakumbi.
Imithombo:
Bourne, EJ Ukuxhalabisa kunye nePhobia Workbook. 4 , 2005.
Ukushisa, iDD Xa i-Panic ihlaselwa , ngo-2006.
U-Ellis, A. Inkolelo-ntlonelo yokuzihlonela: Indlela yokwenza utyando olusisiseko sengqondo lunokutshintsha ubomi bakho ngonaphakade , ngo-2006.