Iingcali ezininzi zixhomekeke ekusebenziseni esi sicwangciso sisebenza.
Ukuba lakho iqabane likhohlise kuwe, kwaye uzama ukuxolelanisa nokuvuselela ithemba, uya kujamelana nemingeni enzima kakhulu isibini esitshatileyo esinokufumana. Isicwangciso esinye esisetyenziswa ngamanye amaxesha ukuxhathisa ukungathembeki okungakumbi ukuba iqabane elingathembeki lisayine "isivumelwano sokungathembeki emva kwesigxina," ukuvuma ukuhlawulwa kwemali ethile (okanye enye into ebalulekileyo yexabiso) ukuba ihlawulwe kwakhona xa ikopela kwakhona.
Izivumelwano ezinjalo, ezaziwa nangokuthi "izigatshana zokuphila" zingabhalwa ngabameli bezomthetho.
Ummeli womtshato waseManhattan, uJacqueline Newman, uchaza izizathu eziqhelekileyo zezizathu zokubambisana: "zenziwa ngokuphindaphindiweyo emva kokuba kukho into ethile yokungathembeki emtshatweni. Umntu oye waphambuka uzama ukuqinisekisa umlingane wakhe ukuba akayi kuphinda aphinde aqiniseke ukuba uthembekile kwesi si thembiso, uzimisele ukubeka ipeni kwiphepha ukuze abonise ubuhlungu. "Uyabalumkisa ngezi zivumelwano kuba," Ukuba uthe wenza ngokugqithiseleyo kwidokethi ukuze ufumane ithuba lesibini, ubeka umngcipheko ukuba iqabane lakho limele lide kuze iinki zomele ukubiza umnqweno wakhe weqhawulo-mtshato ngoku ukuba bayazi ukuba baya kuzuza into enhle. "U
UNksk Newman ukholelwa ukuba ngamanye amaxesha i-postnups ingaba yintoni efunekayo ukuba isibini siqhubeke phambili. Ngethuba elincinci lokungathembeki, ngamanye amaxesha bayasebenza ngoba xa iqabane likholelwa ukuba iqabane labo elilahlekayo lizimisele 'ukuhlawula' izono zakhe, kubonisa ukuba bazinikezele, kwaye oko kukho konke okufunekayo ukufumana isi sibini emva kwendlela. "Uyabhala," Izivumelwano ezingasemva zingaphantsi kwezona zivumelwano, kodwa sinesabelo esilungileyo kubo eofisini lam. "
"Ukukhuseleka kwemali ngokuqhelekileyo akunakwanela ukuyeka umntu ocebileyo." ~ Andrew G. Vaughn, igqwetha kunye noprofesa
U-Andrew G. Vaughn, igqwetha, umninimzi we-NuVorce, kunye noNjingalwazi woMthetho woBudlelwane baseMakhaya e-Loyola University yaseChicago School of Law uthi ezi zigatshana zokuphila ziqhelekileyo kunye nabaxhasi bezidumi.
UProfesa Vaughn uthi, "Awusebenzi. Abantu ababutyebi banemali eninzi. Imali evimbelayo ngokuqhelekileyo ayinakwanela ukumisa umnotho-mali. "Akacebisi kwaye ubhala ukuba aqhelekanga. Enyanisweni, utsho ukuba kunzima ukuqulunqa izivumelwano ezinjengezi.
UBrithy Austin, ummeli wezomthetho wase-Arlington waseTexas wasekhaya wase-Texas, ukholelwa i-postnups ukukhusela ukungathembeki "ngokwenene ayinqabile phakathi kwendawo ephakathi ukuhlalisa abantu abaphezulu. Ziye zithandwa ngabantu abadumileyo, amanani karhulumente ... ezopolitiki. "Kodwa, nakwiimeko zakhe, ezi zivumelwano nangaliphi na uhlobo aziqhelekanga. "Ukuba kubandakanywa njengonqandeko, amathuba omntu wokukopela avuma ukunika zonke iimpahla zakhe zihluphekile." UNksz. Austin ukholelwa ukuba ezi mvu melwano azisebenzisi kakuhle kunye nobutyebi. "Ukuba sele usesimweni sokwenza ukuhlawula, imali ayinayo ixabiso elifanayo kwaye ayiyi kubangela ukungathembeki."
Uninzi lwamazwe alinalo "inkohlakalo" ngokwemitshato yokuqhawula umtshato, kodwa kwimeko yakhe yaseTexas, inkundla inokubonga inani elingenamlinganiselo yelifa kwezinye iziganeko zokungathembeki esekelwe "ekuchitheleni ifa lommandla umntu ngaphandle kweqabane lakho okanye abantwana - ukuchitha umhlaba. "Uthi uNksz.
Austin.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, uRandall M. Kessler, ugqwetha lomthetho wezentsapho, umlobi, kunye nomthetho weprojekthi ye-school e-Atlanta, ubika ngokubona ezi zivumelwano ngokuqhelekileyo ekusebenzeni kwakhe, kwaye ukholelwa ukuba ziba ziindawo eziqhelekileyo. "Akunjalo nje xa umlingane engenzi kakuhle, kodwa nangona isihlobo sifuna ukunika ipropati ipropathi kodwa ayiyithandi elinye iqabane, 'ligcina isipho kwintsapho.'" Ukholelwa ukuba bayasebenza, kwaye "bayanyanzeliswa onke amazwe ngaphandle kwe-Ohio kunye nento abakwenzayo, kukubangela ukuba abantu baxoxe ngokuqhawula umtshato wabo. Kutheni ufuna ukuya enkundleni kwaye unobungozi ukuba ube nesivumelwano esilandelayo emva kokuba uxoxisane nxamnye nokufunwa ngaphantsi kwe-postnup? "Uye wabakhuthaza, umzekelo," Xa umntu ekhupha kumlingane wakhe, kodwa akafuni Umtshato uyaqaphela, nangona kunjalo, "njengalowo naluphi na icala lentsapho, cingisisa ixesha elide ngenxa yokokuba xa kuphakanyiswa umxholo okanye abagwebi bebandakanyeka, iimvakalelo ziyanzima kwaye zihlala ziqhubela umtshato."
UJeffrey A. Landers, i-CDFA ™, umdali we-Think Financial, Not Emotionally® brand yeencwadi kunye neeminina ezilungiselelwe ukufundisa, ukuxhobisa nokuxhasa abafazi ngaphambili, ngexesha kunye nangemva kokutshatyalaliswa kubhaliwe kwesi sihloko kwi-Forbes kwi-intanethi. Uchaza ukuba, "Imigaqo yokuphila idilesi engezizo zezemali zomtshato, njengokuba ngubani oya kwenza umsebenzi wendlu, ubukhulu bezithuba ..." Ziyabonwa ngokuqhelekileyo njengezikhokelo zokuziphatha emtshatweni, kwaye nangona zingagxile kwizinto eziphathekayo , ngokubhekiselele, ngokuqhelekileyo kukho izigwebo zemali ngenxa yokungaphumeleli ukuthobela imiqathango. "Uthi izigaba ezibandakanya ukungathembeki zizona zixhaphakileyo kwaye ziyaziwayo kwiimigqaliselo ezinjalo zokuphila. Ngokutsho kukaMnu Landers, abayikho nje i-celebs, nokuba kunjalo.
Ngokommeli wenkundla yasekhaya yasePennsylvania, uJeffrey Kash, esi sihloko asiveli rhoqo kwizenzo zakhe, kodwa ezi zivumelwano ziyakunyanzeliswa kwimeko yakhe. Ucebisa abathengi "batshabalalise izivumelwano ezenza ukuba bangathembeki kunye nezinye izivumelwano apho iqabane liye laziphatha kakubi emtshatweni kwaye lifuna ukuhlala emtshatweni." Ucebisa ukuphishekela le mvume "ngelixa elinye iqabane livakalelwa ityala" elinceda iqabane elithengileyo phambi komdlalo wokulahlwa nokulwa nokuqala. "Musa ukukhawulela ezi ntlobo zezivumelwano ekungathembeki ngamalungu esini esahlukileyo." Uphakamisa kwakhona.
UMnumzane Kash uchaza ityala elalisingatha iminyaka emininzi edlulileyo, apho indoda yadibana nomfazi emva kokuba umfazi abe nomcimbi. Njengemeko yoxolelwaniso, umyeni wabuza ukuba umfazi asayine "isivumelwano esilandelayo emva kokubambisana nomntu onokwakheka umtshato kwimeko apho ekugqibeleni wayebandakanyeka kwintsebenziswano engaphandle komtshato." Unokuqiqa ukuba kwenzekani emva koko. Umfazi uyaphinda aphinde aphinde aphinde asebenze, emva kokuba umfazi wayemnike ilungelo lokutshatyalaliswa kwempahla yomtshato, yaxhaswa.
Njengabalingani bomtshato, nokuba ngaba izigatshana zokuphila ngokungathembeki zinyanzeliswe, okanye nokuba zisetyenziswe ngababini okanye hayi, ukuthetha nokucinga ngazo kungenceda. Ukuba zixoxwa ngokufanelekileyo kwaye ziyakwazi ukuxhaswa, ziyakwazi ukucwangciswa ukuze zenze ukukhohlisa kunye nezinye izenzo ezimbi. Zingasetyenziswa kwakhona apho zombini amaqela afuna inkqubo yokuqhawula umtshato ukuba igcinwe imfihlo xa kwenzeka ukuziphatha kakubi kwangaphambili. Zonke iingcali zenze iingongoma ezifanelekileyo ukuba ziqwalasele ukuba ingaba le nto ingaba yinto efanelekileyo kumtshato wakho.
Inkqubo yokuxoxisana "iigatya zokuphila" inokuvula imida yokunxibelelana phakathi kwabatshatileyo, kwaye uncede umtshato kwiindlela ezingalindelekanga. Ezi ziqendu zingakhuthaza abantu kwibudlelwane obuzimeleyo ukuxoxa ngemiba yokuthembeka nokulindela kwangaphambili. Iimvakalelo malunga nokuxhaphaza kunye nokungathembeki ziya kucaciswa. Unxibelelwano olulodwa lunokuba luncedo, nangona isiqendu singagxininiswa.
Ziziphi izibini ezitshatileyo ezibhekiselele kumagatya okuphila kufuneka agxininise ingqalelo kwisimo sengqondo somntu okhohlisayo. Ukuba iqabane eliye lahleka libonakala likulungele ukwenza nantoni na ukuyigcina umtshato, kubandakanywa ukusayina i-postnup, engabonwa njengenyathelo elilungileyo phambili. Ngaphandle koko, ukuba iqabane elithengileyo limele lidibanise iqabane layo elingathembekanga kwisivumelwano esinjalo, mhlawumbi kubonisa ukuba ukuziphatha ukukopela akunakuguquka.