Ukuphulaphula ngokunyanisekileyo yinkqubo yokuphulaphula ngenyameko xa omnye umntu ethetha, ecaphula aze abukise emva kokutshoyo, kwaye ugweba isigwebo kunye neengcebiso.
Ukuphulaphula ngokunyanisekileyo kubandakanya okungakumbi nje kunokuva oko omnye umntu akutshoyo. Xa uqhuba ukuphulaphula ngokukhawuleza, usebenza kulokho omnye umntu athi ngaphandle kokunika iingcebiso okanye ukugweba.
Into ebaluleke kakhulu ekuphulaphuleni ngokukhawuleza ibonisa emva koko isithethi sithetha ntoni.
Amanyathelo alandelayo anokukunceda ukuba ube ngumphulaphuli osebenza kakuhle:
Jongana nexa umntu uthetha. Ngokubanzi, kufuneka ujonge ukudibana kwamehlo malunga ne-60-70% yexesha ophulaphulayo. Ncike kumnye umntu, kwaye ugxininise intloko ngezinye izihlandlo. Gwema ukunyathela iingalo zakho njengoko oku kukubonakalisa ukuba awuphulaphuli.
Esikhundleni sokunikela iingcebiso okanye iingcamango ezingafunekiyo, velisa nje into ekhankanywe. Unokuqala ngoku ngokuthi "Ngamanye amazwi, uthini na ...".
Musa ukuphazamisa ngelixa omnye umntu uthetha. Musa ukulungisa impendulo yakho ngelixa omnye umntu uthetha; Into yokugqibela ayithethayo ingatshintsha intsingiselo yento esele ishilo.
Ukongezelela ukuphulaphula oko kuthethiweyo, jonga ukuziphatha okungenanto ukuthabatha intsingiselo efihliweyo. Imbonakalo yobuso, ithoni yezwi kunye nezinye iziganeko ngamanye amaxesha kunokukuxelela ngaphezu kwamagama kuphela.
Ngexa uphulaphule, vala ingxoxo yakho yangaphakathi. Gwema ukuhamba. Akunakwenzeka ukuphulaphula ngenyameko omnye umntu kunye nelizwi lakho langaphakathi ngexesha elifanayo.
Bonisa umdla ngokubuza imibuzo ukucacisa oko kuthethiweyo. Buza imibuzo evulekile ukukhuthaza isithethi. Gwema imibuzo evuliwe ye-yes-okanye-ayikho into eyenza ukuvala ingxoxo.
Gwema ngokukhawuleza ukutshintsha isihloko; kuya kubonakala ukuba awuzange umlalele omnye umntu.
Njengoko uphulaphule, vula, ungathathi hlangothi, uze unqande isigwebo kunye neengcamango.
Iingcebiso
- Yiba nomonde xa uphulaphule. Siyakwazi ukuphulaphula ngokukhawuleza kunokuba abanye bangathetha.
- Funda ukuqonda ukuphulaphula. Jonga uonononongo lwethelevishini kwaye uqaphele ukuba ngaba udliwano-ndlebe uqhuba ukuphulaphula ngokukhawuleza. Funda kwiimpazamo zabanye.
Umzekelo Wokuphulaphula Okusebenzayo
Ngomzekelo olandelayo wencoko yefowuni, uya kuqaphela ukuba ukuphulaphula ngokukhawuleza kwenza isithethi sizive kwaye sikhuthaza intetho evulekile.
ULisa: Saw Jodie ... Ndiyaxolisa kakhulu ukulahla oku kuwe, kodwa ndalwa noodadewethu kwaye asinakuthetha ukususela ngoko. Ndivakalelwa nje ngokwenene.
Jodie: Hi Hi ... kulungile, akukho ngxaki. Ngako-ke wayilwa kwaye nina madoda ningathethi?
ULisa: Ewe .... sasixabana ngenxa yokuba ndifuna ukuba afike kwindawo yethu kwieholide kodwa wathi kunzima kakhulu kubantwana kwi-tow. Ndandithukuthele ngelo xesha, kodwa ngoku ndiziva ndibuhlungu.
U-Jodie: Ndiva ... unayo kwingxabano kwaye yenza ukuba uhluthe, kodwa ngoku uvakalelwa kakubi ngako.
ULisa: Ewe, uyandithukuthelisa kakhulu, ndicinga ukuba ngenxa yokuba andinabantwana andinakukwazi ukuqonda oko kukuthi.
Ndiyazi ukuba kuya kuba nzima kuye, kodwa ndacinga ukuba uya kufuna ukuchitha iiholide endaweni yethu nantoni na. Asikwazanga ukuvuma konke.
UJodie: Uvakala ngathi unomsindo ngenxa yokuba wayecinga kwaye akazange afune ukubeka nayiphi na umgudu wokukubona.
ULisa: ngokupheleleyo. Mhlawumbi ndimele ndimxelele kwakhona ukuba ndiyayiqonda, kodwa ukuba ndiyathemba ukuba uza kuza. Okanye mhlawumbi banokufika nje ngosuku kunokuhlala ebusuku. Andifuni ukuphikisana naye kwakhona.
U-Jodie: Ngoko ... mhlawumbi uya kuthetha naye kwaye umxelele ukuba uyaziqonda iimvakalelo zakhe ... kwaye ukutyelela ngosuku kungabi kubi?
ULisa: Ewe, oko ndicinga ukuba ndiya kwenza. Enkosi! Ndivakalelwa ngakumbi kuba nethuba lokuxelela oko ndivakalelwa.
Uphando malunga nokuLawula ngokuKhe
Kwisifundo se-2011, uGearhart noBedie bafumene ukuba ukuphulaphula ngokuthe ngqo kubandakanyekile nezakhono zentlalo kunokuba kunokuba zizakhono ezingabonakaliyo , ukubonisa ukuba umphulaphuli okhutheleyo unxulumene nokuba ngumlingani ococekileyo kunokuba anakho ukulawula ukuxhumana .
Kuthetha ukuthini oku ukuba uxhalabatheke ngokuxhalabisa abantu ?
Abantu abaphulaphulayo nabaphulaphuli kakuhle bayakuqalisa nokugcina iingxoxo. Ukuba uhlakulela izakhono zakho zokuphulaphula, uzakuphucula ikhono lakho lokuthetha-nangona kunjalo, ungalindelanga ukuba kuncede unciphise naziphi na iimpawu zokuxhalaba ozidlalayo. Uya kuyidinga ukujongana nokuxhalaba kwakho ngokwahlukileyo, ngokusebenzisa unyango okanye olunye uhlobo lwenyango, ukuze izakhono zakho zokuphulaphula ngokukhawuleza zikhanye.
Umthombo:
I-Gearhart CC, i-Bodie GD. I-Active-Empathic Ukuphulaphula njengeSakhono soLuntu jikelele: Ubungqina obuvela kwi-Bivariate and Canonical Correlations. Imibiko yoNxibelelwano ka-2011; 24: 86-98.
KwiNyuvesi yasePennsylvania State. Ukuphulaphula.