Kutheni iimeko ezingavumelekanga ngokomoya zingabangela ingozi
Imeko engabonakaliyo yimiqathango nayiphi na imeko echaphazela abanye abantu apho baphendule khona kwiimvakalelo zakho zemizwa engafanelekanga okanye engahambelaniyo. Kwimeko yomdaka womntu ongenamkhawulo (BPD) , "ukungasebenzi" kuthetha ukungaphumeleli ukubonakalisa iimvakalelo, ukuhlonipha nokuqonda.
Yintoni eyenzekayo kwindawo engavumelekanga?
Kwiimeko ezingabonakaliyo, uxelelwe ngokucacileyo ukuba ukubonakalisa iimvakalelo kulungile.
"Umntu ongenasiphelo" angaphika, angawunaki, uhlekisiwe, ungayichazi kakuhle, okanye uzivelele iimvakalelo zakho.
Naliphi na uhlobo lokungagunyazi, kuthatha umntwana okhulayo kwiimeko ezingabonakaliyo ufunda ukuba iimvakalelo zakhe ngenye indlela ayilunganga, mhlawumbi zingabalulekanga. Njengoko ekhula, le nkolelo ingamenza angathembeli iimvakalelo zakhe. Kungakhokelela ekuphuhlisweni kweBPD .
Indawo yokungakhuselekanga ngokomzwelo ebuntwaneni ikholelwa ukuba yinto yamava obomi ababeka abantu engozini yokuphuhlisa i-BPD.
Imimandla engavumelekanga kunye noPhuhliso lweBPD
Ngokomzekelo, kwimeko engabonakaliyo yekhaya, umntwana okhungathekileyo aze aqale ukukhala angaxelelwa ukuba, "Yeka ukwenza njengomntwana!" Imfuno zangempela zomntwana ziyanakwa. Njengoko umntwana ekhula kwaye ukungavunyelwanga kwemvakalelo kuyaqhubeka, unokuzama kunzima nokuba abazali bakhe baphendule ngeemvakalelo zakhe ngendlela efanelekileyo.
Ukuba azinjalo, umntwana unokuphela kokuzilimaza ukuze athathe ingqwalasela, ukuqinisekiswa kwakhe njengomntu onokuthathwa ngokungathí sina, ukuba ufuna kakhulu.
Ngamanye amaxesha ulwalamano olungenakunqwenelekayo lwentliziyo lwenzeka "ngokwemvelo," njengokuba kukho ukungafani phakathi kobubele babo nabazali babo.
Ngokomzekelo, umntwana onamahloni okhulayo kwintsapho ephumayo, ethethayo unokucatshulwa aze ahlekise ngenxa yokuba uyathula aze azigcine.
Kwimeko ekuphambene noluhlu lweemvakalelo zokungavumeleki ngokomzwelo, abazali banokunyanzelisa ngabantwana babo ngamabomu okanye baxhaphaze ngokwemvakalelo okanye emzimbeni njengesijeziso sokubonisa iimvakalelo zabo.
Yintoni Ukuqinisekiswa?
Ngokwenene, ukuvumela omnye umntu ukuba azivume kwaye uyayiqonda iimvakalelo zakhe, nokuba uyavumelana noko akutshoyo okanye akunjalo.
Ezinye iingcali kwi- BPD ukuxilongwa kunye nonyango bacinga ukuba enye yamava ebalulekileyo ebuntwaneni, ukukhathazeka ngokwemvakalelo , yinto ebalulekileyo yeBPD. Ukutshatyalaliswa ngokomzwelo kukholelwa ukuba "basebenzisana" nommandla ongenakukhuseleka ngokomzwelo kwindlela yophuhliso lweBPD.
Abantu abanobuthathaka emoyeni:
- Yiba nomoya okanye uvuke ngokukhawuleza
- Ukuvakalisa iimvakalelo zabo, nangakumbi
- Thatha ixesha elide ukuzola kwaye ubuyele kwiimeko zabo eziqhelekileyo zemoya
Ukuthambekela kokuphendula ngale ndlela kwiimeko zengqondo kunokukwenza kube nzima ukujamelana nokukhula kwimeko engakhuselekanga ngokomzwelo.
Akunjalo Wonke umntu onokungazivumeli iiNdlebe
Njengoko uyazi, wonke umntu uhlukile, kubandakanywa nendlela abafumana ubudlelwane kunye nokusebenzisana nabanye.
Umzekelo, ukuba ukhulele kwindawo engafanelekiyo, mhlawumbi wafumana ezinye zezinto ezichazwe ngasentla. Oku kwenzeka ngakumbi ukuba unayo i-BPD. Kodwa kwakhona, mhlawumbi awuzange, kwaye ngoku uqonda ukuba awuzange ujonge amava akho angamavakalelo ngaloo ndlela.
Kutheni kuluhlu olubanzi lweempendulo? Ezinye iingcali ze-BPD zikholelwa ukuba ukunyamezeka kungaphinda kuthintele indlela umntu onokukhathazeka ngayo kwimeko engabonakaliyo ngokomzwelo.
Imithombo:
ctgrp.org. Ukunyanga kweendlela zokuziphatha: Iimbuzo ezibuzwa rhoqo (2009) .Seattle, WA: Behavioral Tech, LLC.
Rochefort SM. Inxaxheba yokhuseleko lokunamathisela kunye nokungavumelekanga kwimiqondiso ye-borderline (2014). I-Master of Arts yobuGcisa. Vancouver, Canada: Yunivesithi kaSimon Fraser.
Linehan MM (1993). Ukunyangwa kwengqondo yokuziphatha komngcipheko wobuntu bomda. INew York: I-Guilford Press.
Linehan, MM (1993). Incwadana yoqeqesho lwezakhono zokuphatha ingxaki yomntu ongapheliyo . I-New York: I-Guilford Press.