Uphando kunye neengcebiso malunga nendlela yokunciphisa uxhalaba
Ingxaki yokuxhalaba kwezenhlalakahle (SAD) yintlupheko yesifo sengqondo kwaye isenokuchaphazela ukuthandana nobudlelwano obusondeleyo kwiindlela ezahlukeneyo. Apha sixoxa ngophando olutshanje malunga nesihloko sokuthandana kunye nolwalamano xa unenkxalabo yokukhathazeka kwentlalo, kunye neendlela zokunceda ulwalamano lwakho kunye noxinzelelo lobuhlobo.
Ukuthandana
Kuhlolisiso lwabantwana abaselula, ukwesaba ukuvavanya kakubi (FNE), inkalo enye yokuxhalaba kwentlalo apho uyikayika ukuba kuqondwe kakubi, yafunyanwa ngokucacileyo ukuba ubungqina besini esithandanayo.
Ukuthandana nobudlova kuquka ukuhlukumeza ngokomzimba, njengokubetha, ukusetyenziswa kwesixhobo, isondo ephoqelekileyo; kunye noxinzelelo lwengqondo, njengengcango yokuqhawula, ukuthuka okanye ukungafuni ukuthetha nomlingane. Kucingelwa ukuba kulo mzekelo, impendulo okanye "ukulwa okanye indiza" impendulo ingabonakalisa ukutyekela.
Ukuthandana
Ukuxhalaba kwezenhlalakahle kungenza ubudlelwane be-intanethi kunye noonxibelelwano kubonakala kunokwenzeka, kodwa sebenzisa ukuqaphela. Uphando olutshanje lubonise ukuba abantu abane-SAD banomdla wokucinga ubudlelwane be-intanethi njengento elula, ephephile, kunye nokulawulwa kangcono kunokuba ubudlelwane bomntu. Le ngcamango ingakhokelela ekusebenziseni i-intanethi ngokugqithiseleyo kunye nesimo sokuphepha ukujongana nemeko ebusweni, apho, ukuba unayo i-SAD, wazi ukuba sele kunzima.
Nangona kunjalo, ukuthandana kwe-intanethi kungaba yindlela enhle yokudibana nabantu kwaye ubazi ngokuthumela imiyalezo, ukuthumela imiyalezo okanye i-imeyili ngaphambi kokuba udibane nabo ngomntu.
Ubudlelwane obunothando
Ngelishwa, i-SAD ingathatha inkokhelo ngokukwazi kwakho ukumisa, ukuphuhlisa nokugcina ubudlelwane bokuthandana.
Ingxenye yale nto inokwenzeka kuba kunzima ukuvumela ukuba uqaphele kwaye uzive usengozini, kwanomntu omthandayo nomthembayo. Ukuphakamisa ukuxhalaba kwakho, ubunzima obusondeleyo obusondeleyo obubangelwa yintlungu ngenxa yokuba unokubona njengengozi kakhulu.
Kulabo bafumana unyango kwaye banako ukufumana iqabane elixhasayo nakuba kunjalo, ubudlelwane obunempilo kunye obuzalisekileyo abukho konke ngaphandle kombuzo.
Iingcebiso zokunciphisa ukuxhalabisa
Ukuba ukhathazeke ngokuthandana, zigcine ezi ngcebiso:
- Thetha malunga nezinto ezibalulekileyo kuwe. Nangona le nto yinto yokugqibela ofuna ukuyenza, ukusondelana kwangempela kusekelwe ekuzileni nasekuqondaneni. Awukwazi ukuba nakho ngaphandle kokwabelana. Oku akuthethi ukuba ufuna ukuchitha yonke intetho enika imbali yakho yobomi, kodwa cinga ukuxelela umhla wakho malunga nento okanye umntu obalulekileyo kuwe okanye into ocinga ngayo ngokutya kwakho.
- Gxininisa kumhla. Cinga ngezinto ozenzayo okanye oko udlayo kunye nendlela oziva ngayo ngexesha. Ungakhathazeki malunga nexesha elidlulileyo okanye elizayo, zama ukuzonwabisa kwaye uyamkele ilungelo ngoku.
- Zinike indawo yokuba ungubani. Wena ungumntu obalulekileyo onokuqonda kwakho, amava kunye nobuntu bakho. Funda ukuvuma oko, ukuthanda ukuba ungubani kunye nento omele unikeze ngayo umntu olwalamano.
- Cinga iyona nto ibhetele. Ungagxumi kwizigqibo malunga nokuba umhla wakho unokucinga ntoni ngawe. Ukuxhalabisa kunokufumana okusemandleni ethu xa senza iingcamango malunga noko abanye bacinga okanye bazive, kodwa ukucinga ukuba akungalungi kuwe kuphela, akukho mnye umntu. Ngokukhawuleza xa uvalelwa loo tape entlokweni yakho ekutshilo ukuba akayi kuwe okanye ucinga ukuba unamantongomane, uyichukumise kwaye ubeke endaweni ephethe iingcinga ezilungileyo ngathi, "Ndinexesha elihle," "Oku kutya kukumnandi , "okanye" Incoko yethu ihamba kakuhle. " Ukutshintsha iingcamango ezingalunganga ngezinto ezilungileyo kukuthile onokuyisebenzela kwangaphambili.
> Imithombo:
> Hanby MS, Fales J, Nangle DW, Serwik AK, Hedrich UJ. Ukuxhalaba kwezenhlalakahle njengento ebangelwa ukutshatyalaliswa kobudlelwane. Umbhalo woBundlobongela obuPhakathi . 2012; 27 (10): 1867-88. i-doi: 10.1177 / 0886260511431438.
> Kolakowski S. 5 Izindlela zokunqoba ukuxhalabisa. Scientific American. Ishicilelwe ngoSeptemba 12, 2014.
> Lee BW, Stapinski LA. Ukufuna ukhuseleko kwi-intanethi: Ubudlelwane phakathi kokuxhalaba kweentlalo kunye nokusetyenziswa kwe-intanethi engxaki. Umbhalo weengxaki zokukhathazeka. NgoJanuwari 2012; 26 (1): 197-205.
> Porter E, i-Chambless DL. Ukuzilahla Kwindlela Efanelekileyo: Ukukhathazeka Kwezenhlalakahle Kwiintsebenziswano ZamaRoma. Journal of Clinical Psychology . 2013; 70 (6): 546-561. i-doi: 10.1002 / jclp.22048.
> Zaider TI, Heimberg RG, Iida M. Ukukhathazeka kokuxhalabisa kunye nobudlelwane obusondeleyo: Ukufundiswa kwemiSebenzi yemihla ngemihla. I-Journal ye-Psychology engavamile . 2010; 119 (1): 163-173. i-doi: 10.1037 / a0018473.