Umbuzo oyintloko oyicelayo iqabane lakho
UDkt. Sue Johnson, i-psychologist kliniki kunye nomdali weengxaki zengqondo (EFT) yezibini, ufumene izinto ezintathu ezibalulekileyo ukuba ulwalamano kufuneka lube nenjongo yokuphila ngokwenene. Uyabona ukuba xa izibini ziphikisana nomnye, kwaye enye yezo ntlobo zeengxabano zegazi, akukona ngokuphathelele izitya, udoti, nokuba nemali, njengoko izibini ezininzi zicinga ukuba ziyiyo.
Xa ubudlelwane bengakhuselekanga kwaye amaqabane aziva ekhutshisiwe, omnye uhlobo lomxholo wenza izizathu ezifanelekileyo zokulwa. Lo mxholo, nangona kunjalo, akuyona into ekulwa ngayo. Into abayiphikisana nayo ngumbuzo oyintloko othi "ngaba unayo kum?"
Abalingani bayabuza omnye komnye "Ngaba ukhona kum?"
UJohnson unikeza abalingani kwiprogram yomgwaqo ukuze baqinisekise ubudlelwane ngokusebenzisa i-EFT ukuba bancede baphendule umbuzo othi "unayo kum" ukuqinisekisile. Ubhala izinto ezintathu ezifunekayo ukuba ziphendule ukuba "ewe" kulo mbuzo oyintloko kwaye yenza kube lula ukukhumbula ngesigrama ISIHLOKO Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kwiinkalo ezifanelekileyo kukuba: ukufikeleleka, ukuphendula, kunye nokubandakanyeka kwengqondo. Ukuba unqwenela ukuphucula ulwalamano lwakho, qalisa ukugxila ekunyuseni ezi ziimpawu kunye.
Ukufikeleleka
Isithako sokuqala esinobuhlobo obuhle kukufikelela.
Abantu kufuneka bazive ngathi iqabane labo li fi kelele kubo, kwaye iqabane lawo lifanele lifikeleleke. Ukuze ukwandise ukufikeleleka kobudlelwane bakho, thobela ingqalelo iqabane lakho kwaye uqaphele ukuba kubonakala ngathi bazama ukukufikelela. Kungasoloko kunzima ukwandisa isebe lomnquma ngexesha lokunqanyulwa, ukuze iqabane lakho lizame ukufikelela kuwe emva kokulwa kodwa ngendlela elula.
Zama ukuvulela loo nto. Kubalulekile ukuba ufumaneke ukuphulaphula nje. Amaxesha amaninzi abantu bafuna ukuvezwa ngamaqabane abo, kwaye banqwenela ukuvelana, kodwa bafumana isisombululo esingafunwa. Unokwandisa ukufikeleleka kwakho ngokuphulaphula kunye nokuqinisekisa ukuba iqabane lakho livakalelwa njani. Kuhlala kulungile ukuqinisekiswa.
Ukuphendula
Isithako sesibini esibalulekileyo kwimpilweni enempilo kukuphendula. Le nto ibonakala ibonakala, kodwa, ndiza kuthetha njalo. Xa iqabane lakho liza kuwe, phendula. Ukuba ngokwenene awufumaneki ngenxa yokuba wenza enye into, bazise kwaye baqinisekise ukuba iinkxalabo zabo zibalulekile kuwe. Fumana ixesha elizayo ukuba unokuhlangana ukuze uxoxe ngombandela kwaye ngokwenene uzukise ukuzinikela. Xa amaqabane aqala ukuqhelana kwaye angaphenduli omnye nomnye, avule ubudlelwane bawo kuzo zonke iintlobo zengxaki ezinzima. Kunoko, hlala uxhumeke ngokuphendula.
Ukuzibandakanya Emoyeni
Isithintelo sesithathu esibalulekileyo ekusebenzisaneni olufanelekileyo kukubandakanyeka komzwelo. Iimvakalelo azizange ziqondwe kakuhle, kodwa uphando oluninzi lukhokelela ekuqondeni ukwanda kwabo. UJohnson uxela ukuba uthando luyintsebenziswano engakumbi kunabo bonke, kwaye uphando nge-neuroscience, psychology , ne-biology lubonakala luxhasa le mabango, njengoko ibonisa kwincwadi yakhe ethi Love Sense: I-Revolutionary New Science of Relationships .
Ngoko ke, kubalulekile ukuba amaqabane asebenzisane nomoya. Akubalulekanga kuphela ukunyamekela ngamava akho omama kunye nokuzibuza, kodwa kufuneka ubenze bazise. Amaqabane amaninzi asebenzisana nabo asebenzayo, azinamandla ngakumbi.
Ngexesha elizayo xa ungena kwelinye lala maqhawe apheka igazi kunye neqabane lakho, yima, uthathe umoya ophefumulayo, uzibuze yona nto ulwa ngayo ngoku. Amathuba kukuba, nonke nizabalazela ukuba nibone ukuba ukhona apho kunye nokuba unomdla kangakanani omnye nomnye. Ukwandisa ukufikeleleka kwakho, ukuphendula kunye nokubandakanyeka ngokomzwelo kunye nomnye, kwaye iimfazwe ziya kuqala ukululayisa, njengoko ziza kuba malunga nezitya, udoti kunye nemali.
Ukufumana umgulana ogqithiseleyo ngokomzwelo osondeleyo kuwe, I-International Centre for Excellence kwi-EFT inoluhlu lwabaphengululi ngedolophu, ilizwe kunye nelizwe.