Ngaba ungumtshato wenkonzo? Ukuba kunjalo, thintela ukwenza ezi mpazamo
Ukuba wena kunye nomlingane wakho nisisini esinye, unokwenza iimpazamo eziphambili ezinokulimaza umtshato wakho. Ezi zinto ezimbi ziza kuba uzilungele ukukrakra, ukuxubana, kunye nokuphikisana okungafaniyo kwintsapho yakho yonqulo. Siqulunqe uluhlu lweemposiso ezenziwa ngabantu abatshatayo.
Musa ukwenza ezi mpazamo kwiNkcubeko yakho yokuThatana
- Ukungahoyi ulwahlulo lwenkolo.
- Ukuthatha "uthando lunikela yonke" isimo sengqondo kwaye singayinaki ingxaki yokucinga ukuba iya kuhamba.
- Ukukholelwa ukuba iinkonzo ezahlukeneyo zonqulo azibalulekanga kwixesha elide.
- Ukucinga ukuba ukuhlaziywa kukuba konke okufunekayo ukuze usindise ukungafani kwenkolo kumtshato wenkolweni.
- Ukunciphisa ukuba kukho ezinye iinqunto ezingenakucatshiswa njengokwaluka, ubhaptizo, i-bris, ishumi, kunye nokunye.
- Ukukholelwa ukuba ukungafani kokholo kuya kuhlala kuyinkinga engenakuqhathaniswa kumtshato wakho wezenkolo.
- Ukungaphumeleli ukubaluleka kokuqonda, ukuhlonipha, ukwamukelwa, nokujongana neentlukwano zakho zonqulo kumtshato wenkolweni.
- Ngaphandle kokuba kubekho ukusetyenziswa kakubi komzali, ukwenza isigqibo sokunquma ubudlelwane kunye nosapho olude.
- Kucinga ukuba uyayiqonda yonke into yokholo lomnye.
- Ukukholelwa ukuba uthando lwakho lomnye nomnye luya kunqoba zonke iingxaki zakho zomtshato.
- Ukucinga ukuba ukuguqula ikholo lomlingane wakho kuya kwenza izinto zibe lula.
- Ukugxotha iindleko zakho zeentsapho malunga nomtshato wakho wezenkolo.
- Ukukholelwa ukuba umtshato wakho wezinkolo awuyi kubakho naziphi iingxaki.
- Ukungathethi, ngaphambi kokuba umtshato wenkolo, ukuxhalabisa malunga nokukhutshwa kwezenkolo zabantwana bakho.
- Ukungafuni ukufumana iimpawu eziqhelekileyo iinkolo zakho ezinokuba nazo.
- Awuvulekanga ukuhlola indlela imvelaphi yakho, iinkonzo kunye neenkcubeko zenze ngayo isimo sengqondo kunye neenkolelo zakho.
- Ukungaphumeleli ukucwangcisa phambili kwieholide kunye nezinye izenzakalo ezijikelezayo zobomi.
- Ukunyanzelisa iinkolelo zakho kwiqabane lakho.
- Ukuguqula iiholide kwintcintiswano phakathi kweenkolelo zakho.
- Andiqondi yakho ukholo.
- Ukuqhubela phambili ukutshintshisa amaqhosha atshisayo malunga nokwahlukana kokholo.
- Ukuvumela iintsapho kunye nabahlobo ukuba bangene phakathi kobudlelwane bakho bezenkolo.
- Ukungabi nhlonipho kwifa lemveli.
- Ukungabi nolwazi malunga nefa lemlingani lakho, inkcubeko okanye iinkolelo zonqulo.
- Ukuhluleka ukuxelela ngexesha lakho iintsapho kunye nabahlobo bezinqumo zakho zeholide.
- Ukunyanzelisa abantwana bakho ukuba bazive ngathi kufuneka bakhethe phakathi kootata okanye unina.
- Ukunika abantwana bakho ukuphazamiseka, izimo zengqondo okanye izimvo malunga nenkolo yeqabane lakho.
- Ukuzikhethela inkolelo yakho yonqulo kwaye ungabangazi okanye uthetha ngokholo lwakho neqabane lakho.
- Ukunika okuninzi kangangokuthi ulahlekelwa yizithethe zakho kwaye ekugqibeleni, ukuzihlonela kwakho.
Ngokomxholo we-Luchina Fisher ka-2010, u- Chelsea Clinton weNkathazo yoMtshato woThathane: Izingane, iiHholide, ukuCinga ngemiphefumlo , uSusanna Macomb uthe enye yezona mpazamo ezinkulu ezithandanayo kunye neentlobo zabalingani abazenzayo azibonakalanga phambi kweentsapho zabo.
Kubalulekile ukuba benze izigqibo njengesiqabane aze abonise - ndawonye-kwiintsapho zabo. "Kulula ukubeka isohlwayo kwintsapho," kusho uMacomb. "Kuyakuthi ukhusele umlingane wakho kubazali bakho. Musa ukuphosa, ngosuku lwakho lomtshato, ukhetha umlingane wakho.
Ukutshata ngaphandle kokholo lwenu kufuna ukuba bobabini baqokelele ngokukhethekileyo, bahloniphe baze bahlasele ukuba babe nobuhlobo obude obude. Kuya kuthatha umlinganiselo omkhulu wenzame ukungavumeli iimpembelelo zangaphandle zenze umonakalo ongenakucinganiswa phakathi kwakho bobabini, njengemithetho kamasipala okanye nootatomkhulu, kunye neenguqu zakho zangaphakathi kwimvelaphi yonqulo.
Thatha ixesha ngaphambi kokuba utshate uhlolisise le nkxalabo omnye nomnye, (okanye ungathathi hlangothi ngaphandle kobuchwephesha), onokuza. Ukuba sele sele sele sele sele ihamba kwaye sele ufumana ubunzima bokuhamba le ndawo, funani uncedo lochwepheshe ngokukhawuleza.