Kukho iindlela zokubona umntu olele
UHray Herbert wabhala kwinqaku ethi, "Indlela Yokufumana Umqambimanga: Iingcamango Zengqiqo Ukukhohlisa", "Uninzi lwethu lukwazi ukubona ubuncinane ngaphezu kwehafu yenkohliso kunye nokunyaniseka."
Ukuthetha umqambimanga akulula. Iingqungquthela zakho zingena endleleni yokufikelela enyanisweni.
Nangona ezinye izazinzulu zathetha iindlela ezimbini zokubona umqambimanga, abaphandi baseBrithani baqikelela ukuba ukunyakaza kwamehlo akuyiyo ingqiqo yamanga.
Ngokomzekelo, ingcali yokunyaniseka uStan Walters, iingxelo zokuba ukulingana kweso kweso sixhobo esisebenzayo ekufumaneni inkohliso.
"Uphando lubonisa ukuba akunakwenzeka ukufumana ubuxoki obusekelwe kwimiqondiso yamehlo." UAnahad O'Connor "Ngokwenene? Unokwenza Ukhohlisi Ngokujonga Amehlo Omntu", NYTimes.com (Julayi, 2012).
Ngoko, uyazi njani ukuba okanye wakho umlingane ulalaphi?
Kukholelwa kakhulu ukuba phantse wonke umntu ulala rhoqo. Kwi-intanethi kunye ne-ABC News ngo-2002, iNzululwazi yaseYunivesithi yaseVirginia uBeel DePaulo wathi abanye balala bebalulekile kwimpilo yemihla ngemihla.
Nazi ezinye izizathu ukuba lakho iqabane lingathetha, libonisa ukuba uxoxwe, kunye nento ongayenza ngayo ngamanga nokuxoka.
Ezinye izizathu Abantu Bathi:
- Ukuphepha ukulwa.
- Ukuthintela ukukhusela iimvakalelo zomntu.
- Ukuphephelela imiphumo yokuziphatha kwabo.
- Ukuhlehlisa ukuba kufuneka wenze utshintsho kwindlela yokuphila.
- Ukufihla into abayenzayo okanye abangazange bayenze.
- Ngenxa yokuba besoyika ukugatywa okanye ukulahlekelwa ngumlingane wabo.
- Ukulawula imeko.
- Ukuphepha ukuhlazeka.
- Ukuze bazenzele kakuhle.
- Ukuze bazenze bavele baphumelele, bekhethekileyo, okanye abanetalente kunokuba babenene.
Ngaba Ngaba Ukhohlisayo?
Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuphazamisa ukuphazamiseka okanye ukuphazamiseka okanye ukungabikho kokuthintana kwamehlo okulala?
Oku kunokubangela ukungahambi kakuhle okanye ukulahlekisa iziphathamandla zomlingane wakho. Izikhokelo ezingabonakaliyo ukuxoka kunokuba nzima ukuzibona kwaye zihluke kumntu ngamnye.
Umgca wecala kukuba, ukuba ucinga ukuba iqabane lakho lixoki, buza imibuzo kwaye ucele ukucaciswa ukuba kuyimfuneko. Ezinye iingcali zikholelwa ukuba kufuneka ucele unxibelelwano lwamehlo uze ucele ukuba ibali lixelelwe. Kubalulekile ukuba uthembele emathunjini akho kunye nokuzivocavoca okanye loo mvakalelo ehlekayo ongayinayo ngaphakathi.
Izimpawu ezibonakalayo zokuLola:
Khumbula - ininzi yale miqondiso ingacatshulwa ngokulula kwaye ingachazwanga!
- Ukuthintela iinki, okanye ukuxubha ikhupha
- Ukuwela iingalo okanye imilenze
- Ukudlala ngeenwele
- Umgca wesipfulelo kwiphepha xa kungengomhla ofudumeleyo
- Ukuthi "cha" maxesha amaninzi
- Ukuqhubeka nokukhanyela amangalelwa
- Ukuzikhusela kakhulu
- Ukubonelela ngolwazi olungakumbi kunye neenkcukacha ezithile kunokuba ziyimfuneko okanye ziceliwe
- Ukungalingani kwinto ekwabelwana ngayo
- Ulwimi kunye nesibonakaliso sobuso asihambisani nento ekuthethwa ngayo ngokuthi "hayi", kodwa ugxininisa ikhanda phezulu
- Smugness
- Unokubeka umqobo njengedesiki okanye usihlalo phambi kobuqu
- Ukuzola ngokuqhelekileyo
- Ukungafuni ukuthintela iqabane ngexesha lokuthetha
- Ukungabaza
- Slouching posture
- Ubungqina okanye ugciniwe
- Ukuziphatha okungafaniyo njengokungahambi ngendlela eqhelekileyo
- Ingalo engavumelekanga okanye engaphelelwanga kunye nokunyakaza kwesandla
- Ulwahlulo oluthile
- Ukungabikho komnwe okukhomba
- Ukuguquguquka kwezwi okungavamile, ukhetho lwegama, isakhiwo sesigwebo
- Ukucima ingxoxo ngokusetyenziswa ngokuphindaphindiweyo kweekhefu kunye nezimvo ezinjenge "um" okanye "uyazi"
- Ukungabikho kokusetyenziswa kwezicatshulwa. Okukhethayo kugxininisa "kungekhona" xa uthetha
- Ukusetyenziswa kwegama lokugcwalisa amagama okanye iimpendulo ezingapheliyo xa usebenzisa umnxeba
- Ukungabikho kwezivakalisi ezininzi ngelixa uthetha
- Uphephe ukudibanisa kwamehlo, amehlo ekujikizela ngakwesokudla, ekugqibeleni ukugqithiseleyo, okanye ukujika kuwe xa uthetha.
Ngaba Uyajamelana Nelixoki?
Ezinye iingcali zithi xa ukholelwa ukuba uxoxwe, akufanele udibane neqabane lakho kunye nezikhalazo zakho ngokukhawuleza.
Bancoma ukulinda de ufumane ulwazi oluninzi kunye neenkcukacha. Ezinye iingcali zikholelwa ukuba ngokukhawuleza amakhadi aphezu kwetafile, kwaye ukunyaniseka ngokukhawuleza kuphinda kuphinde kuphinde kube ngumtshato, kungcono. Nguwe kuphela owaziyo okulungileyo kumtshato wakho.
Ukuthengwa kwi-Amazon: Indlela yokwenza i-Spot, i-Revised Edition: Kutheni Abantu Bengazi Inyaniso ... kunye nendlela Ongabamba ngayo ngoGregory Harley noMaryann Karinch
* I-Article ihlaziywe nguMarni Feuerman